Odd Tests.

Thames Star, Volume XII, Issue 3921, 23 July 1881, Page 1

Odd Tests.

Taste and try before you buy, is a very wise rule, if it could only be followed; but in this world most things must be taken upon trust: infallible tests are as rare as infallible remedies. It was a custom among the Nestorian Christians, immediately upon the conclusion of the marriage ceremony, to carry the newly made wife to the house of her husband's parents, and place an infant in her arms, and three sets of baby-clothes before her. If she succeeded in dressing and undressing baby three times to the satisfaction of the critical matrons there assembled, well and good ; but if she failed she was sent to her old home again, to stay there, a wife and no wife, until able to face and pass a second trial. Sakti Kumara, the hero of a curious Hindustani story, preferred testing a damsel's capability before tying the knot. Master of a prosperous and profitable business, he came to the conclusion that a wife was wanted to complete his happiness, and determined to go in search of one. Adopting the guise of a fortune--teller, and carrying some rice bound up in his cloth, he started on his travels. Whenever he encountered a girl that pleased his eye, he asked her to cook his rice for him. Some laughed at him, some reviled him, none seemed inclined to comply with his modest demand, and it seamed as if he would hare to take his rice home uncooked. At last he reached Swira, where he beheld a beautiful girl, who, instead of ridiculing or abusiug the strange traveller, relieved him of the rice, and bade him be rested. Then the kindly maiden set about preparing the rice. First she steeped it in water, then dried it in the sun, and, that accomplished, rubbed the grains gently on the ground, removing the awn without breaking the rice. Calling her nurse, she despatched that worthy to sell the bran, and with the proceeds, purchase an earthen boiler, two platters and some fuel. By the time this commission was executed, the rice had been brayed in a mortar, winnowed and washed, and was ready to be put in the boiler with five times its bulk of water. As soon as it had swollen sufficiently, the boiler was taken from the fire, the water cleared of the scum, and the boiler put back, and the rice constantly stirred by the pretty cook until she was satisfied it was properly done. By turning the boiler mouth downwards she extinguished the fire, and collecting the unconsumed fuel, despatched the old woman to convert it into butter, curds, oil, and tamarinds. This achieved, she told the enraptured Sakti Kumara to go and bathe and not to omit rubbing himself with oil. Haying obeyed orders, the wife seeker

was directed to seat himself upon a plank upon the well-swept floor, on which were already laid a large plantain leaf and two platters. His charming hostess then brought him water in a perfumed jug, and administered two spoonfuls of well--seasoned rice and ghee, preparatory to serving up the remainder of the rice mixed with spices, curds, butter and milk, of which Sakti Kumara ate his fill, and then indulged in a siesta with a mind at ease, knowing his quest was ended. As soon as he awoke he asked the girl to become his wife, and she being willing, the necessary ceremony was gone through, without delay ; and the supposed fortune--teller took his bride home, to astonish her as the Lord of Burleigh astonished his rustic love ; but the Hindu lass was luckier than Tennyson's heroine, for we are assured that she lived long to worship her husband as a god, to pay the most assiduous attention to his household affairs, to superintend the regulation of the family coming in due course, and. made her house such an abode of bliss that Sakti Kumara was well repaid for the trouble he had taken to get a good wife, and tasted in his well-ordered home the joy's of Paradise. Some people are never satisfied, however fortunate they may be. A nursemaid in the service of an English family in Russia, left her place to get married, but had not been long wedded ere she complained to the Natchalaish of the district in which she was domiciled, that her husband did not love her as he should do; and on the official inquiring how she knew it, replied: "Because he never whips me." Doubtless the disappointed one meant what she said, but she might have changed her note had her desire been gratified; like the young wife suddenly bereaved of a rich old husband, who refused to believe her dear partner could be so cruel as to leave her, (crying out, "He's alive, doctor; I'm sure he's alive ; tell me, don't you think so?" This piteous appeal the physician met by suggesting the application of a galvanic shock, and offering to apply the apparatus. " Oh, no, no !" exclaimed the griefstricken widow; " hard as it is to bear my fate, I will have no experiments against the law of Nature; let him rest In peace!" When it is desirable to put anyone to the test, there is nothing like doing so without warning. An actor fond of playing practical jokes at the expense of "utility" men heard that one of them — his particular aversion—had boasted that if any trick was played upon him he would turn the tables in a way that would astonish the actor. The latter, of course, resolved to test the boaster's readiness on the first opportunity. He did not have to wait long for the chance. One night, when the house was crowded, the carpenters failed to get a scene ready in time, and a " dead stick" ensued. Knowing his man, the stage manager entreated the joke-loving actor to go on and " gag " for a few minutes. " Certainly," replied he ; and seeing the utility man at the wing, he seized him by the wrist, and, in spite of resistance, dragged him to the centre of the stage, and said: "Your sister, then, has been betrayed. Tell me the story!" The frightened fellow had no story to tell, to the crafty joker's delight. Whether the audience in front and the manager behind were equally pleased, the record saith not. In olden days the burgesses of Grimsby were wont to decide which among them should be mayor, by a very odd process. Having chosen three of tbeir number as eligible for the position, they blindfolded them, tied hunches of hay at their backs, and conducted them to the common pound where a calf awaited, their coming. He whose bunch of hay was first eaten by the calf was pronounced most worthy of the mayoralty, and installed into office accordingly. William Thomson, the once famous Maori chief, adopted a shrewd method of deciding which of his two sons should succeed him. As they stood before him as he lay sick unto death, he suddenly addressed himself to the elder, saying, " Shortland, take down that gun and shoot the white man standing outside the hut." The youth was about to obey the order, readily enough, when his brother intervened with, " Why should you kill the man? What harm has he done to us?" Then said the old chief, " Yes, that is right. You have what is wanted— sense and discretion. You will take my place when I am gone." And so the succession was settled.