Essie on the Mowry.

Thames Star, Volume XI, Issue 3593, 2 July 1880, Page 2

Essie on the Mowry.

By Josh Billings Junioe.

The subjec' of this littel effort is that specimen of the nobel savage as comes" from a plate they call New Zealand. The Mowry is shaped jnst like me and you, but his colur is like aa if he had a blak eye all over Ins body. The natral requirements of this nobel eretur is pippies " and miners—the fust for food and the 2und for drink. They also like huhus, which look like niickroskoped maggots, and are much sweeter than the song of the gaw»gaw on tha branches of the verdant pohutokowai. All the niowry men are callrd " Zhach," and all the introduclshun you nede is to say " Hurroh Zhaek.: "—ever so much better than having the 3rd parti making two people friends. The mourys have a language but i only no 2 words, namely— Fustly, " Tanakwy " ; and 2uudly, ! " Youbet." By the jewdishiows use of these words i have akted asjnterruper lots of times. Of kes you n*ed to be so quik that they dunno what you say, but keep on explaining what you want with your hands. The printsipal occupashuns of the subjec' of tbis notis is honest industry and tellfn lys. They are prater at the 2nd than the fust, which consists of cultivaiin cumeras, fleas, and cetera. Tv pair of Mowrys is much better paper at tellin lys than tv pair of Ananyases and »Saffiras with aces at the head; your morning contemp. is nothin to them, i don't kno much about the women, indeed i have only spoke to one onst. i rested mi gentle trotter case on her toe, and she swetely said, " Git off you phool." I perlitely lifted my beever, smoje, aa' then shifted my offendin Crocker. In conklusion I may add " The time will come when the Mowry will sit on the minddome of the Pacific Hotel, and sketch the wreck of Curfcises warf with baths atached-, which kost thruppence each." [Slitely altered from Mackawley].