MR KROEGER'S MICROPHONE.

Thames Star, Volume IX, Issue 3029, 30 October 1878, Page 4

MR KROEGER'S MICROPHONE.

My friend Kroeger was greatly excited over the telephone and phonograph when they first oarae out, and his enthusiasm was so great that he purchased one of each, and experimented with them to his heart's content. , ,

When he heard of the microphone. his joy knew no bounds, and he determined to have one if possible. This he: found to be next to impossible; so, from, the account he.read of the one invented by Professor Hughes'of London, he set to and constructed one himself, which did all that was claimed for the original,) and more, too—according to Mr Kroeger's statement.

He came to see me the other evening, and before he left he gave me a full and comprehensive history of his microphone, and the result of his experiments. As near as I can remember, he spoke; about as follows:

" You see, the peculiarity, or rather the mission, of the microphone is to magnify sound. It is one of the greatest things that ever emanated from the mind of man. •The one I have made is a boss magnifier, you "bet, and when a snowflake lands on the microphone, it makes-a report like that of a fire-cracker."

" I put a geranium on it the other day to see if I could hear it grow." "You did?" I queried absentmindedly. " Of course I did," he continued, with enthusiasm, " and in a moment I heard the plant growing. It commenced like a mosquito, and in a little' while the buzz increased in volume until it was quite capable of making a saw*mill sick with envy. "After this I had the extreme satisfaction of hearing the sap flowing up and down trees, and the noise it made almost deafened me; it was a sort of Niagara Palls on the half- shelf." •'I should like to see your microphone very much," I said. " You shall see it," he went on," and I'll bet you'll say it beats the deck on general principles. Why, only the other: morning I was awakened by what at first appeared a bugle-blast, and looking around, I discovered a fly blowing his nose on the microphone. Magnify sound! why the other day, in order to give the thing a square test, I invited a' deaf man to dine with me, and rigged up the microphone under the table. That: man was as deaf as a post; put when some flies walked across the machine, he wanted to know the meaning of the cavalry-charge." • I didn't know how to reply to him. I; was taken completely by storm with his I marvellous statements.

" I then placed a fresh oyster on the instrument; but, as it was dry, it emitted only a sort of funeral grunt. After it was moistened, however, it treated me to what might be very appropriately called an opera-boufie chorus. I could also hear it snore in its sleep, and roll around with the nightmare." ■ ' v " It is truly wonderful," I assured him. " Well, yes," he' went on, feeling the importance, of the microphone and himself, and the influence they would both be likely to' exert on civilised socieiy, ' • it is kinder wonderful in its way."

"On one occasion, a young man unfconseious of the proximity of the microphone, commenced his vesperian practice on the cornet. The concussion knocked him off the chair, shattered several'sashes of glass, and sent a lot of bricks flying down the chimney. To-morrow I am going to use it to get some of the secrets of the eagle on the new silver dollar,, and I want you to come around. Will- you come?"

"Of course I will," I replied. Shortly after this he departed.—-H. E. M. in Puck. ■•■ ■ ■ ■■■ ■■■ ■'■■". ■■'::' ■;'