A DIRTY MEMBER.
It was in the Bland Hotel, not far from this office, Slumpkins came home late, having been out to dine. As soon as he got to his bedroom, after a confused struggle up a winding staircase, he lit a candle and perceived somebody in his bed, apparently full-dressed , and thus, he soliloquised : " Look 'c here, mate---hic —I don't mind a man getting into my bed, thoughitsno th' thing; but a man who gets into 'nothers man's bed With his boots on is a dirty member.; Get up, you goose-eyed son of a cackler, or I'll mix you up like pumpkin sarse. Get up/ And then Slumpkins .went for the object addressed. He first poked him in the eye, and when this produced no fisible effect^ for the eye would not gouge, he went straight in and slogged the intruder. Presently it became apparent to the senses of Slumpkins that his labors had been in vain. He woke to a full-sense that a joke had been played upon him. Some friends, acquainted with the humorous side of his character, had placed a " stuffed man " in his bed, with the view of having some fun out of it, and they got what they wanted.
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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/THS18780614.2.22
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Thames Star, Volume VIII, Issue 2911, 14 June 1878, Page 4
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205A DIRTY MEMBER. Thames Star, Volume VIII, Issue 2911, 14 June 1878, Page 4
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