A 5,000 YEAR OLD WILL.

Temuka Leader, Issue 2377, 2 July 1892, Page 4

A 5,000 YEAR OLD WILL.

A very old MS. has just come to light in Egypt. It is the will, written upon parchment, of a noble Egyptian, of the name of Sckiab, in which the testator states that he leaves all his property to his brother, a priest of Osiris. A second piece of writing was also found, in which Sekiah commends his little daughter to his brother's care, and in which he states that he wishes her, upon attaining her majority, to have full control of her money matters. Both documents are drawn up in a most concise and lawyer-like manner. The manuscripts are about 5,000 years old. A SUM IN SUBTRACTION. A suRERB young woman, who had high birth and abundance of money, saucily told a girl in her set recently that she always kept callers waiting twenty minutes before she appeared. The girl who received this valuable piece of news called upon the golden calf a few days afterwards. She sent up her card, and the footman returned with the message that Miss would be down in a few minutes. The caller took out her watch, and, when seven minutes had expired, wrote upon one of her cards; “I have been gone just thirteen minutes.” Leaving this card on the table, the young lady took her departure. *A VAIN SEARCH. Yellowly : *• Why, Brownly, how bad you look this morning. Did you sleep las\ iight ?” Brownly : " Not a wink.” •* Anybody ill ?” *• No, but I'm mad.” “ What’s the matter ?” *' Well, you see my wife has been in the habit of going through my pockets at night, and I thought what was good for the gander was good for the goose, so after she fell asleep last night I set out to go through her pocket.” “Well, did you find anything?" “ No. Searched the blooming dress over and over, spent the whole night at it, but •ouldn’t find the pocket,” UNABLE TO COME TO AN UNDERSTANDING. Footpad (presenting pistol) : " Fork over your rhino, and be quick about it!" Near-sighted Oxonian : " Beg pardon !” (Sternly); “No monkeying ! Unlimberl Produce the scads !” " Pardon me, but I do not exactly apprehend the drift of your ?" " Cheese your patter ! Don’t you see I’ve got the drop ! Unload your boodle !” ” I am totally at a loss, my dear sir, to perceive the relevancy of y>.'ur observations, or to—:"

” Clap a stopper on your gab and whack up. or I'll let ’er speak! Turn out your bundle quick ! Get a squirm on you !” ”Is there any peculiarity in the external seeming of my apparel or demeanour, sir, that impels you. a total stranger, “ Once more, you dash-bedashed bloke, will you uncork that swag ?” (Hopelessly bewildered) ; "My friend, I confess my utter inability to gather any coherent idea from 'the fragmentary observations yon have Imparted. There is something radically irreconcilable and incapable of correlation in the vocabularies with which we endeavour to make the reciprocal or gqrrespondential interchange of opr icjeg’mfeiligibls, Yon will pgrdqp me if I sqg gest that synchronization of purpose is equally indispensable with homogeneity of cerebral impression, as well as parallelism >f idiom and " But the highwayman bad fled in dismay.