"HOGS, I’VE GOT YOU NOW!"

Temuka Leader, Issue 1664, 24 November 1887, Page 3

"HOGS, I’VE GOT YOU NOW!"

Some years ago an eccentric genius, the Rev. Thomas P. Hunt, used to give temperance lectures in America. One night he announced that he would lecture in Easton. Now, temperance was not in favor among the male portion of that burgh. The women, however, were all for the “pledge,” and, consequently, on Hunt’s first night not a man showed himself. The benches were pretty well filled with women, though, and Hunt commenced; but instead of temperance, he took them to task on the vanities of dress, etc. They wore great stuffed feather sleeves then. They—the sleeves — caught it, then the tight lacings and so on through the whole catalogue of female follies; but not a word about intemperance; and the ladies went home nearly mad, told their husbands about it, and voted old Hunt a regular muff. He had announced that he would lecture at the same place the next night. Long before the time appointed they began to arrive, and when Hunt hobbled down the aisle the building was completely filled with men. The old fellow looked about, chuckled, and muttered:—“ Hogs, I’ve got you now!” The audience stared. “Aha, hogs, I’ve got you how!” he repeated. After the crowd had got quiet a little, the lecturer said: “ Friends, you wanted to know what I meant by saying ‘ flogs, I’ve got you now,’ and I’D, tell yon. Out West the hogs run wild; and when folks get out of meat they catch a young pig, put a strap under his body, and hitch him to a young sapling that will just swing him from the ground nicely. Of course he squeals and raises a rumpus, when all the hogs gather round to see what’s the matter, and then they shoot them at their leisure. Last night I hung a pig up J I hurt it a little, and it squealed. The old hogs have turned out to-night to see the fun, and I’ll roast you.” And so he did, pitching into their favourite vice with evident relish.