JOSH BILLINGS’ PHILOSOPHY.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1388, 5 September 1885, Page 3

JOSH BILLINGS’ PHILOSOPHY.

The world generally git things about level ; they bar allowed a fu deserving ones to go unrewarded. But i never knu them to let a ded beat git the start ov them, for enny grate length or time. What Heaven denies us is worth more to us, if we only knu it, than what Heaven givs.

Det is a kind ov slo pizon. One hit to 5 misses is about the fair average ov life ; and the world keeps a stern record ov the misses, and leaves the hit* to bio their own horn.

Truth is a simple thing, but it rules the universe, and fashions the destiny of man. When we are yung we are phull up ov hurrah and nolljexperience, and when we git old wo have a little experience and no hurrah at all. “The world never waz so korrupt as it is now.” This haz been the opinyun ov the best krokers we hav had enney for the last four thousand years,

Men seldum gro more virtuous as they gro older. They sumtimes tire out their vices. Lies are ov three colors—black, white and haff-and-haff; and ov three i konsider the blak hue the safest and roost respektabh-. Opinyuns, the best of them, are but respektable guesses. Thare are very fu plezzures in this world that are worth the price that iz paidffor them. Thare iz nothing more plentiful than time. Thare iz two minnutes wasted to one used in every man’s life. There iz nothing so mean and so plenty az envy, and thare iz nothing pays so little ou the investment.

Dogs, little children, and even kats, know who their friends are. All atheists and infidels have once been beleavers, and will be again before they die, but they may not have the manlyness to own it. Silence iz safe. We kan hear more, and expoze ourselfs less. Simple men are not allwus grate but grate men are allwus simple. Great men ale lik lions, one or two iz enuff for a nashun, and itiz the safest plan to keep them in a cage. Welth don’t konsist so mutch in the amount or money a man haz az in the amount ov hiz wants.

Ideas are what wins; they have h«v no weeping sentimentality in them, but bololy go for the bull’s eye every time.

Australians and New Zealanders (says an exchange) will note with interest that Sir James Fergussou wilt stand for Northeast Manchester at the coining general election. Sir James Feiguasou has seen service in many'fields. He was wounded at lukernian ; be represented Ary shire for I some years in the House of Commons ; he 1 was successively Governor of South Australia, Governor of New Zealand and • Governor of Bombay, aud held other offices under the Government, w hile he now appeals to a wotting man’s constituency in the Conservative iulerist.