COLLECTING A BILL.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1272, 2 December 1884, Page 3

COLLECTING A BILL.

A citizeu who lias an office on Monroe avenue has for the last three years been owing a grocery bill. The grocer's collector called on him over a liundreil times to secure payment of the debt, but was always put off with some excuse or other. A.t one time it was death, another sickness, another time bad luck, and so it went on until it really seemed impossible for the debtor to invent any new pleas. The other day the grocer himself took the bill in his fist and cornered the debtor in his office. "Yes, I know—very sorry —hand you the money a week from to-day," was the smiling exeust.. " See here !" said the grocer, as he locked the door and pulled off his coat, "I've been figuring on this matter. This bill is for lodols. I can give you tile worst licking a man ever received, and get off with a fine of lOduls. I'll then give you a receipt for the other five and the account will be closed. Prepare to be pulverised !" " But suppose I lick you —theu what ?" queried the other. "Then there won't be any resort to the law, and you shall have a receipt in full 1" " That spems fair, and I'll do my best," said the debtor, and at it they weut. The grocer expected to get away with him in about a minnte, but he was a deceived man. It wasn't over three minutes before he was knocked over a chair aod rendered horsde combat. "Is it a receipt in full V asked the debtor as he sat astride of the other and kept both hands fastened in his hair. " She is !" " And you'll pay me 2dois in cash for the broken furniture V "les." "Theu you may get up, and I'll recommend you to a doctor who'll fix your broken collar-none as good as new inside of a week." The grocer gave him a receipt for the accouat and handed him 2dols in cash, and later in the day, when telling the story in his store, he explained :—" Gentlemen, I've gassed scores of citizens, abused dozens of hackmen, aud been aching for three years past for a chance to pulverise some. It's worth 17dols to me to know that my grit gives out with the first round !"