MISCELLANEOUS.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1243, 25 September 1884, Page 3

MISCELLANEOUS.

“ Buohu-Patba.” —Quick, complete cureall annoying Kidney, Bladder and Urinary Disaaees. At Druggists. K-mptherne, PiosB -r & Oo , A-i'enfa, O.jvistohuroh. 2 “ This is a sad commentary on the boasted civilisation and Christianity of our age,” despondingly murmured a tramp when he discovered that the ham he had stolen at twilight from a grocery was a wooden one. Decline of Man. —Nervousness, Weakness, Dyspepsia, Impotence, Sexual Debility, cured by “Wells’ Health Eenewer.” Druggists. JKempthorne, Prosser & Co., Agents, Christchurch. 2 Deafness, it is said, can be cured by one being suddenly surprised. All a physician need do, therefore, is to whisper to the patient that he doesn’t intend to charge anything. Ten chances to one the patient will hear. Horse Cards. —Horse cards of any size can be obtained at the office of this paper on the very shortest notice. Our selection of “ cuts” is the best in South Canterbury, notwithstanding statements to tha contrary, as an inspection will prove. The prices are lower than those of any other establishment. [Advt.] It is one of the inconsistencies of life that we throw bouquets at the soprano and bootjacks at the tomcat. Can’t Pbbach Good, —No man can do a good job of work, preach a good sermon, try a lawsuit well, doctor a patient, or write a g:-od article, when he feels miserable and dull, with sluggish brain and unstrung nerves, a d none should make tha attempt in such a 0 ndi'ion when it can te easily and cheaply b moved by a little Hop Bitters. Look for Advt Bishop Wurtzburg, a noted clergyman, used to delight in telling a joke at his own expense. He was walking in a meadow one day, when he met a little shepherd lad. “ What are you doing my son P” asked th* Bishop. “ Tending swine, your reverence.” “ How much pay do you get ?” “ One florin a week.” “I am also a shepherd,” continued the Bishop, “ but I hare a much better salary.” “ That may be, your reverence, but then I suppose you havejtnore pigs under your ears,” replied the boy. A Beautiful Painting —Mr Q, G. Green, of Woodbury, New Jersey, U si.A., is printing to druggietn and others in this country some very fine pictures in oil of his misgnificsnt house and grounds and laboratory at that p’ase. Mr Gteon is the pro prietor of Boiohea’a German Syrup and Green’s August Flower, two very valuable medicines, which arc meeting with great fhvor, the first as a remedy l or pulmonary complaints, and the latter for dyspepsi * and disorders of tha liver. These preparations , have attained an immense sale solely on their superior merits, and are sold by all Druggists throughout the world, The pries is the earn e for ewb, 3s (id per bottle, or sample bottles for 6L The sample bottles enable sufferers to prove their value at a trifling cost. Victim (to dentist) —“ Good heavens, man, that is the second sound tooth you have pulled.” Dentist (to victim) —“ I beg your pardon, sir, but as you had only three when 1 commenced, I think I shall make no mistake this time. Holloways Pills—The Groat Need.— The blood is the life, and on its purity depends our health, if not our existence. These Pills thoroughly cleanse this vital fluid from all contaminations, and by that power strengthen and invigorate the whole system, healthily stimulate sluggish organs, repress over-excited action, and establish order of circulation and secretion throughout every part of the body. The balsamic nature of Holloway’spills commends them to the favor o,f debilitated and nervous constitutions, which they soon resuscitate. They dislodge all obstructions, both in the bowels and elsewhere, and are, on that account, much sought after for promoting regularity of action in young females and delicate persons who are naturally weak, or who from some cause have become so. Don’t Dib in thb Housb.— ‘ Rough on Bats ’’ clears out rats, mice, beetles, roaches, bed bugs, flies, ants, insects, moles, jackrabbit?, gophers. Eempthorne, Prosser and Co., Christchurch. 1