HOW SAM 'TRAINED HIS WIFE.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1121, 3 January 1884, Page 1

HOW SAM 'TRAINED HIS WIFE.

In a Boston restaurant, at dinner recently, sat a man from Cambridge, who was a native of New Hampshire. Meeting an old acquaintance from the indefinite section known as “ down east,” the conversation soon turned on familytopics, and the pair began to. talk about their former neighbors in the most familiar way. “ Yes,” remarked the Cambridge gentleman, “ Sam was in many respects different from the rest of the boys. You remember who he married ? Well, when the old man, her father, said : ‘ Sam, d’ye intend to marry Beckie ?’ Sam never saida word, so the old man said : ‘Me boy, ye know all about them, I can’t tell you nothing. Ye know how the sisters have turned out, and not one of them is now living with her husband.’ Sam was ag mum as a pantomime, and, just as soon as he was ready, him and Beckie got tied. They lived on a farm, and everything went on smooth for about a year, and it came to hog butcherin’ time. Sam got already to have the usual party for the occasion, and, just as he was sharpenin’ up the knives, Beckie came out and said, ‘ Sam, I’m going home.’ Sam protested in his quiet way, but it was no use, so he said he’d get a man to row her across the pond. It was about half a mile over. She said : ‘ No, ye won’t ; ye’ll row me over yourself.’ Sara told her be couldn’t, and Beckie fired up and said : * Then I'll drown myself.’ Sam said he’d go with her if she. wanted to do that, so the boat was cot ready, she got in, and they rove 1 out till the water was twenty feet deen. Then Sam stopped and said : ‘ Well, Beckie, this is a good place for ye to drown yerself!’ She didn’t open her mouth. He waited awhile and then said : * Come, Beckie, I’m in a hurry to get hack.’ She never looked up. Sam put down the oars, naught hold of her and pitched in. She grabbed for the boat, but he wouldn’t let her get near it. When she was almost done out she said : ‘ Sam let me in that boat and ye’ll never here anything more from me out o’ the way.’ So he pulled her in and they went back home. She changed her clothes and entertained the guests. They’re now nearly 80, and you never saw a happier old couple—did you ? I don’t think they ever spoke of that ducking since the day she was goiu’ to drown herself.”—Detroit Free Press.