MISCELLANEOUS.

Temuka Leader, Issue 1083, 15 March 1883, Page 3

MISCELLANEOUS.

A Ulti-mate-’ern—Marriage. A man in the write place : An editor. How to test the weight of a wall : Scale it. Song of the oyster : Keep me in my little bed. A sad dog : One who tarries long at his whine, * The parting gives me pain,’ as the man said when he had a troublesome tooth extracted. A reason given why a piano was not saved at a fire was because none of the firemen could play on it. Long, pointed finger nails are fashionable among women, but they will never be popular with married men.

Law is like a sieve; you may see through it, but you must be considerably reduced before you can get through it. Rnsticus, in commentiog on the present style of female coiffure, says : —‘ It must be a very poor soil that requires so much top dressing As a physician was feeling a little girl’s pulse she said :—-‘ It’s no use to feel my wrist, doctor. The pain isn’t there. It’s in my head,’ ‘ Don’t you remember the next word in your lesson ? It’s the word after cheese. What comes afteiv cheese ?’ ‘Mouse!’ triumphantly evclairaed the puzzled pupil. Said Brown, who had just returned from a visit outside between the acts:

‘ Oh darling, I’ve had such a fright ! It almost took ray breath away!’ ‘ Mercy!’ exclaimed Mrs 8., turning her face away ; * I wish it had, John.’ And John looked sheepish enough, as he slyly inserted a clove in his mouth.

A brother of Bishop Clark was one of the wittiest men alive. It runs in the family. He once went to see one of his parishioners, a lady with a prodigious family, which had recently been increased. As he rose to leave the lady stopped him with, ‘ But you haven’t seen my last baby.’ ‘ No,’ he quickly replied, ‘ and I never expect to 1’ Then he fled.