WHY SHE KNEW.

Temuka Leader, Issue 292, 18 September 1880, Page 2

WHY SHE KNEW.

The other day there was a suit in Juatioealley between two Wayne County farmer* regarding the ownership of fourteen unmarked grain bags. Each Bide wa« prepared to stoutly swear that the bags were his, and each had witnesses to back his testimony. The complainant swore to buying the bags at a certain store on a certain time, and his hired man swore to handling them as they, were take., from th" waggon. The defendant swore that he purchased them at a certain place at a certain time, and his wife was called to the stand to tell what she knew about it. She was a larga fleshy woman, and very much bewildered. '• Land save me ! but I was never in »uch a crowd before, and I feel as if I should faint!" she gasped as she took the witnew stand. . :':•

" Never mind fainting, Mrs said the lawyer. " Tell thu jury what you know about those bags." "Oh ! land ! but I know all about 'em !

We bought 'em on the 10th November." " How are you Bure it was the 10th ?" "Sakes alive! but I know it was, for I v boxed Melitsa's ears that morning for leaving a spoon in the dish-water, and she was mar-' ried on the 15th." " Wio asked for the bags at the store ?" "Oh! stars and garters! but I did! ,1 remember it as plain as day." " What did the clerk say ?" / " Oh! stars! but he said,' oertainly,' and

ho went .and got 'em." '• What else do you remember ?" " Oh, lands ! but I wanted a calico dress." " And you didn't get it ?" " Bless granny ! I didn't, and we jawed all the way home." " And now, why are you positive that these are the bags ?" " Oh! dear, oh! but while we were jawing, I threw 'em out into the road. Someone lend me a fan, for I'm most dead !" "Never mind being most dead, Mrs X. What else about the bags ?" # ,*' My husband boxed my ears for throwing 'em out. Oh ? stars ? I didn't mean to tell that !" '• He did, eh ? Well, what else P" " Oli ! dear! but when we got home I kicked the hired man !"

" Kicked the hired man, eh? Well howcan you be positive that these are thj bags ?" " Great snakes ! arent you done yet! Yes, I am positive." " How can you be ?" " I don't want to tell." "But you must." $.. " Well, if I must, though I'm sure I shall faint away. That night I boxed Melissa again." " Yes." " And husband boxed me."

"Yes." c " And we both boxed the hired man, and we were all so mad that we sot up all night in our cheers and have had chilblains and catarrh ever since! Do you suppose we'd Jiave made such fools of ourselves over fourteen rain-bags belonging to a man living three miles away!" That settled the c. se with the jury, and the verdict was in favor of the defendant. — «' Detroit Free Press.