ODDS AND ENDS.

Temuka Leader, Volume 2, Issue 151, 4 June 1879, Page 3

ODDS AND ENDS.

Honour’s a good brooch to wear in a man’s bat at all times. “ Dying in Poverty,” says a-modern moralist, “ is nothing ; it is living in poverty that comes hard on a fellow.” Ladv on shopping excursion —“ Oh dear, that blanket is much to good ? I want it for charitable purposes.” Every thing Was put into this world for some good ; even the crow was not made, without caws. “ Don’t yon think husband, that yon arc apt to believe, anything you hear ?” “ No, ray dear ; not when you talk.” No wonder a ship is called “ she.” Bhc has shifts, stays, an apron, hooks, and eyes, pins, caps and ribbons, hoods, poppets, and a husband. A book agent, the other day, talked half an hour to induce a lady to buy a book. Then she handed him a slip of paper, on which was written ; “ I’m dele and dura.” When a man saves Us cigar money to Imv his wife a new bonnet and the children new shoes, it indicates a spell of sunshine. Tho reputation of a man is like his shadow—gigantic when it precedes him, and pigmy in its proportions when it follows him. 11 How many regular, steady boarders are there in this house ?” asked a census taker of a servant girl. “ There’s fifteen in all, sir ; but not mor’n four of ’em is steady persons, sir.” “ I shall awaken in Heaven,” wrote a fair young girl before she took arsenic. But she took too much for a death dose, and awoke with the stomach pump down her throat. Donkcyson says that all Us creditors seem determined to give him the title of Dr., but that they have an awkward wav of writing tho title after his name instead of before it. The character of a wise man consists in three things—to do to himself what he tells others to do, to act cm no occasion contrary to justice, and to bear with the weaknesses of those about him. The English ladies arc working hard for their rights. They have o“ Women’s Protective and Provident League,” a “ Women’s Educational Union,” and a Cl Married W omen’s .Property Act. j L’s funny when you ask a man to advertise he generally declines with Lie j si arena ,- nt that nobody Will see it. rml i if von advortise sonm idilc caper oi Us :iu the news columns gratis, ho gets : indignant over tho certainity that everybody will see it. At least that is wiiat

a veteran nowapapor man says about it. A di tingnisiied Japanese traveller in tin's country writes home : ‘‘ The chief branch of education of young men here is rowing. The people have boat-houses called ; colleges,’ and the principal of these are Yale and Harvard.” Talleyrand was lame. Madame de Stael was cross-eyed. There was no love lost between them, and both disliked to be reminded of their infirmities. “ Monsieur,” said Madame, mooting her dearest foe, one day, “ iiow is that poor leg?”—“Crooked, as you see was Talleyrand’s reply. A near-sighted Boston man was lately riding in a street car, when a lady opposite bowed to him. He returned' the bow, raised his hat, and smiled sweetly, and was just wondering who she was, when she came over and whispered in his oar, “Oh ! I’ll fix you for this, old man ! ” Then lie new it was his wife. An Irish glazier was putting a pane of glass into a- window, when a groom that was standing by began joking him, telling’ him to mind and put in plenty of pul-tv. The Irishman bore the banter for some time, but at last silenced his tormenter with “ Arrah, now, be off wid ye, or I’ll put a pain in your head without any putty.”