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Temuka Leader, Volume I, Issue 84, 5 October 1878, Page 3

Try to make home happy, even if yon have to stay away to do it. A Sunday-school boy, on being asked what made the tower of Pisa lean, replied, Because of the famine in the laud. “ Always pay as yon go,” said an old man to his nephew. “ But, uncle, suppose I haven’t anything to pay with?” “Then don’t go.” “ To edit a newspaper,” says the Rev Mr Talmage, “requires that one be a statesman, an essayist, a geographer, in fact, an encyclopedia.” Yes, and when you have done so with distinguished success for the vetter part of a lifetime, the statesman, essayist, geographer, and encyclopedia of a rival sheet veil 1 seat himtelf at his desk with a heavenly smile and an even pulse, and tranquilly aver that you are a brass-bound and double-riveted centennial idiot, and a roaring, rib-nosed johudonkey of the windy wild !

A man called on a dilatory debtor’ anc p' : : ic:y said—“lf you’ll pay me the amount of your bill immediately, yen oblige mo ; if urit, I .shall have to oblige yon.” A Pratical Be ply. —On one occasion, when on the coniines of the great deseit a traveller asked an old shiek—“What do you do with sick persons when they can’t sleep ?” He received the very practical reply —“We set them to watch the camels, “ See hero, my friend, you are drunk.” “ Drunk ! to be sure I am, and have been for the last three years. You see, my brother and I are on a temperance mission. He lectures, while I set a frightful example.” “Every cloud has a silver lining,” But that is no consolation after all, when you reflect that things are never worn with the lining side out.