THE KAISER.

Taranaki Daily News, Volume LVII, Issue 207, 9 February 1915, Page 5

THE KAISER.

AMERICAN HUMOR. Gott, Gott, dear Gott! Attention blease. Your bardner Vilhclm's here, Und lias a vord or two to say Indo your brivate ear, So dum away all udders now, Und listen Veil to me, For vat I say concerns me much— Mcinself and Shermany. ] | You know, dear Gott, I vas your frien3, Und froTn mein hour of birth I quietly let you rule the heffen ' Vile I ruled o'er de earth; Und veil I told mein soldiers ' Of bygone battle days, I gladly split the glory, Und gave you half de praise. In every way I tried to prove ' Mein heart to you was true, Und only, claimed mein honest share In great deeds vat vc do, You could not liaf a better friendt In sky, or land, or sea, Dan Kaiser Villielm number two, Le Lord of Shermany. So vat T sny, dear Gott is dis: Dat vc should still befriends, Und you should help to send my foes To meet (lev bitter ends, If you, dear Gott,, vill dis me do I'll nothing ask again, Und you and I vill bardiiers'be evermore. Amen. But Listen, Gott! It must bo quick Your help to me to send, ' Or else I haf to stop attack Und only blay defend. • 1 So four and twenty hours I gif ' To make de Allies run, 1 Und put me safe into mein hlace— } De middle of de Sun. 1 If you do dis, I'll do my liart; I I'll tell de world (le fact; ' But, if you don't, den I must tink " 1 It is an hostile act. Den var at once I vill declare, 1 Und in mein anger rise, I Und send my Zep-lin ships to wage 1 A fight up in de skies. ; Dis ultimatum now, dear Gott, M Is von of many more; Mein mind is settled up to clean ' ' De whole world off de floor. , Because you 'vas mein bardner, Gott", An extra chance is given; So help at once, or else I'll be De Emperor of Heffen.