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WHAT USE WAS IT?

V motorist was showing on' his ear to an old sea. captain, whose knowledge ot iccent developments on terra Hi ma is somewhat hazy. "How fast can she travel?'' asked the captain. "Fifty miles an hour."' "Off "the wind?" '•Either on" or on," said the owner. Tho old sea-dog grunted dubiously. His eve caught the steering-wheel. •Is'that yer wheel?" he enquired. "Yes." ••Then wbere's yn- compass? "Don't use one." "Oh, she don't work like a boat, then?" "Quite different." Again the captain grunted as his eye wandered over the snorting contraption, until he caught sight of the extra tyre, fastened on behind, when he demanded, triumphantly! . "Now, if she ain't like a boat, why in the name of Davy Jones do yer carry that there life-belt?"

I Mrs. Kicker: If you arc going to another one of those banquets', I don t suppose you will know the number of the !hou,e when yon get lack. Mr K.ckcI Oh yes I will. I unscrewed it from tin jdoor and am taking it with me." ! Little Willie: Say, pa, what is a li.ypoicritc'- Pa: A hypocrite, my soti, is a ■ man who publicly thanks Providence for his success then gets mad every time anybody insinuates that ho isn't mainly responsible for it himself. '■■ iientlcnian (in an iMorlated state, supporting himself against a telegraph „n't, soliloquising): I snav-lnc-what-ever shall I do when wireless telcgray.iy

■""'•in were von." said the old bachelor irt the benedict. "I'd either rule or know why." "Well." was the reply. "as I already know why, I s'uppose Units HI. the battle!" The Court: Will you -«-u- I Icf < >c prisoner stole your umbrella? he Plaintiff: Your Honor, T will swear 'hat V stole the umbrella I «u s carrying, i

Permanent link to this item
Hononga pūmau ki tēnei tūemi

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/TDN19091127.2.43.1

Bibliographic details
Ngā taipitopito pukapuka

Taranaki Daily News, Volume LII, Issue 250, 27 November 1909, Page 3

Word count
Tapeke kupu
295

Page 3 Advertisements Column 1 Taranaki Daily News, Volume LII, Issue 250, 27 November 1909, Page 3

Page 3 Advertisements Column 1 Taranaki Daily News, Volume LII, Issue 250, 27 November 1909, Page 3

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