HOW TO BE PERFECTLY ADORABLE

Taranaki Daily News, Volume LII, Issue 221, 23 October 1909, Page 4

HOW TO BE PERFECTLY ADORABLE

SEEING PEOPLE AS THEY SEE iTHEMSELVES. Our fellow-creatures are not half so exacting as ninny people would have us believe. They are ready enough to appreciate one's own person, interests, and particular virtues—providing we symp.tihise with theirs. But the trouble with most people is iliat tliey nearly all appear to agree with the Irishman who, on hearing that the gulden rnle in life was to do unto others what you would have them do unto yon. lexclaiuied: ''Well, let them do it first.-' ' To be perfectly "adorable,' dear ladies, it remains with you to be first in taking people at their own valuation. By this 1 mean accepting the standard most people have of themselves and endeavor:ng to agree with it and let them knowhat you do!

■Perhaps you may be inclined to be sceptical and murmur that people plan; 4iicU ridiculously high value on themselves; they thiiik they are perfect paragons of virtues—or even vices, for to be 'considered as possessors of tlu> "pleasant" vices is equally gratifying to some people, and that you could only be accused of the grossest flattery and insincerity by taking them at their own valuation.

Be grossly Mattering; no harm will come of it, for there was never a person on this earth who had any objection to undeserved praise! If among your acquaintances am. friends there are some who imagine themselves to be amateur C'arusos, budding Trees, and Bernard Sliaws, and if it gives them satisfaction to imagine that they have personalities, when but quite commonplace creatures, then it would be indeed unkind to dispel their innocent illusions.

Ingratiate yourselves with them, praise instead of sneer, anil tactfully b'.t them imagine that you are perfectly certain they are all they say—and mm. ! Not uuly will they be pleased with yu i, uut with themselves, which is bet....' still.

It is a foolish policy which iniagims .hat .o acquaint people with their own auk. and vices is doing them the greatest po-»iblc service. i Hou• liLu-riy 1......iken! Ju»t as if any one feels gra'utiid with tile person win makes it n,s ur u.r to tell us our shortcomings. As il we are not painfully conscious and positively .sick of everlasting!,. being told that "but for your abouiinaiiie tempi r, you would make your main in m .vorld," "your conceit bars \i-iir way in success," or that "you wo.i.d gel o.i better with people if you w.-ic a trine more polite." We no doubt respect these kind people who are so tlisinlciesteiii.i concerned for our welfari, ami we c. n admire them for their courage . . . but love them? Never!

Those people who make you feel fools and idiota are no better than those who 'take you lor such.

THE ONE WE REALLY LOVE. The one we all love i*s he or she who has the happy manner of milking u> please;! and satisfied with ourselves, wno draw* out the very best of us, and permits us to .shine occasionally, instead of •silling" on us. 'lo this kino of person, who is so deliriously to.nant; who leads us to believe that even our defects and shortcomings are admirable; w ho takes us at our own valuation, however high placed it may be—we fly to iu our troubles, and who cheers, encourages, and stimulates, instead of "wet blanketing" us, and who never, never assails us with the [most aggravating, that most diabolical of phrases ever invented by man: "I toid you so."

To be adorable, be sweetly encouraging, sympathetic, and tolerant, even to those absurd notions the majority of people have of, themselves, and remember that criticism, however well meant and unselfish,' has worked more o t least, as much—havoc among friends as that greatest of vices—advice! Pearson's Weekly.