"I WANT TO BE QUIET."

Taranaki Daily News, Volume LII, Issue 198, 25 September 1909, Page 4

"I WANT TO BE QUIET."

MAN IS FULL OF MOODS, AND IS OFTEN MISUNDERSTOOD. A really sympathetic woman can always get along well with her husband. In the word sympathy nestles the secret of domestic happiness, waiting to be discovered and carefully nurtured by the woman who wants to "get along," but who cannot. In the first place, most men are sensitive. External things exercise an enormous influence over them. They feel and shudder accordingly if the atmosphere of the home is gloomy. They grow buoyant when the fires are lighted and when there are cheerful faces and happy voices about them.

Then—men are changeable. Usually they like to be loved and made a fuss over, but there are times when they desire to be left alone, and it is here that the question of sympathy and understanding comes in. A woman who herself is equable and of a cheerful disposition often fails to realise the importance of letting her husband alone when he desires to be let alone. She only sees that he seems glum and depressed, and is possessed of a natural desire to cheer him. So she begins: "John, dear, what's the matter?" "Nothing, my dear." "But yovire so quiet." "I feel quiet. I'm tired." "Did you have a hard day." 'Tes, dear." "What did you do!" "Oh—why—the usual things, my dear, the usual things. Go on with your reading. I don't feel in a mood for talking." GOES INTO A CORNER AND SULKS. And then the woman who is not sympathetic—in the real way—thinks he's cross, goes off into a corner, and wishes that she was at home with her mother, and looks so downcast and miserable that her husband, who by that time ha< become immersed in his paper, chancing to look up, discovers that he has done "something or other." Then he ie forced to put down his reading, put aside his feeling of weariness, and comfort that other half, who is merely suffering from a case of misunderstanding of what sympathy really 8. Real sympathy consists of knowing' how to coincide' with various moods. The woman who taUcs when her husband shows plainly he wants to keep silence is not nearly so irritating as the woman who, when her husband comes home in a jovial frame- of mind, greets him pensively and smiles patiently while he relates to her something which has had to do with the day's work. "Yes, dear," is her only comment. Then he telle her something aboat one of his friends at the office. She looks at him with abstracted eyes, thinking all the time of her own affairs. Finally something he says demands an answer, and she gays: "Yes, dear," patiently. "Yes, dear," more patiently. Finally, with an air of martyrdom, ""Yea, dear. By the way, I think that we shall have to get a new cook. Mary wears me out —she is so noisy."

The husband, who ie still thinking of his narrative, answers vaguely, "Oh, yes —no. I donl see anything the matter with her. I wouldn't change if I were you."

Then the wife tragically exclaims, "That's always the way—you never are interested in anything that I am interested in. You're the same as all men. You're selfish!" PRESENT-DAY HUSBAND WANTS A "PAL." Now, just how he has been selfish, of course the poor man doesn't know. He is left floundering In doubt while his wife, w ith an expression of patient forbearance, sinks back and reads the want-advertisements.

The up-to-date man demands a companion, and the woman who is merely housekeeper cannot supply this need. He wants a "pal" to come home to. He wants someone who understands. Marriage is a partnership and it will never be a sucee.% unless it is regarded as such. So—stop thinking of that husband of youis as "the provider." Give lu'm a more dignified place in your thoughts. Sympathise with him as sincerely and cordially a? vru <] B with tfie boy'when he cuts his ringer or your baby girl when she humps her head; and you will find that, in return. Ire will give" to you that whole-soiiled confidence which means so much when given by a man to his wife.