WHEN SHOULD, A MAN PROPOSE?

Taranaki Daily News, Volume LII, Issue 146, 17 July 1909, Page 3

WHEN SHOULD, A MAN PROPOSE?

A TIME WHEN SILENCE IS DANGEROUS. Perhaps there is 110 point in regard to love ami marriage on which all men are more agreed than that r ao man has any right to ask a \votuau to marry hiui uui.il he is in a position to support her •m a luting maimer. A man must aot ask the gin he loves to marry him until the way to fortune is straight before him.

If tlie "asking" means the suggestion of an immediate marriage, with a recKless disregard as to how the claims of iUe butcher and .baker are to .be met, and infinitely* lees thought given to a Juture habitation . than thai bestowed by the birds in the spring, who do build a nest, why, thwi, it is absolutely certain tliat the answer should be a most decided negative. When, however, only marriage in the dim and distant luture is contemplated, it is by no means so certain that a lover should retrain from asking the question which alone can assure his ladylove beond a doubt as to his exact wishes and .ntentioiis. Of course, a -man of high-flown ideas will prate, glibly of leaving the maid of his heart "free"; will almost convince himself that he is nobly standing aside and permitting her to take her choice 01 other and richer suitors'. Unfortunately, feminine perceptions, particularly on the subject of love and marriage, are exceedingly keen, and it is probable that, long before the gentleman grasped that he was in the toils of Cupid, tile lady was keenly awake to the situation and quietly busy either encouraging or discouraging it. This being so makes it surely less advisable that silence on the subject should always he maintained. It is true that very long engagements are by no means altogether desirable; but between an engagement lasting even for years and the same period of miserable uncertainty, -What woman but would choose the former? Only the curious blindness of man outside his own particular beliefs could | permit the masculine half of creation to; imagine itself particularly noble simply by refraining from asking, "Will you marry met" after doing its very beet to win a coveted heart. Unless she is asked the momentous question, a girl is never comfortably positive as to her right to love the man she does love. That she is aware of his love for herself is not enough. More than anything in the world she desires to know beyond a doubt that he has chosen her from all the other women :n j existence.

Let her be assured of this, and she will be content to cheerfully wait until the ship conies home that makes a wedding possiWe. Leave the question unasked, and she still -waits—if she loves—but waits miserably, filled with the doubts and fears that 'ever beset the path of love. In their anxiety to be generous, men forget that a woman adores to be generous aUo. Once let her get into her head that a man has so little belief in the reality of her love that he is waiting until he can tempt her into becoming his wife with all sorts of worldly advantages—let her once believe th.it, and he may bid good-bye to all chances of winning her. Should a man ask a girl to marry him before he is in a position to support a wife'; Indeed yes, when he has permitted her to see that he loves,her. No matter how long the waiting, .both will be the happier for the question being asked and answered.