Page 3 Advertisements Column 1

Taranaki Central Press, Volume IV, Issue 319, 29 December 1936, Page 3

TOO REALISTIC. At a territorial camp a battalion tow beings instructed bn. ‘“How to take a convoy through: open country.” One company was told off to represent a oonvby, the meh Being told to that , they were to .represent horses, cows, •nd waggons/; When the order to advance was.given, the convoy moved on* but the major noticed that one man continued to lie down. He galloped up to him and said, “Why don’t you advance?” ; Tiiia r man replied, “I can’t, sir.” I “You can? What do you mean?” * “I’m a waggon, and I’ve got a wheel cff.” ’4? STILL ANOTHER ONE. r A Scotsman told his wife he probably would, not be home to dinner that evening, and if he were not coming, hh would ’phone her at exactly 5 o'clock; then admonished, “But when you hear the bell, don’t answer -it; you’ll’know what it means and I'll get my penny back.”

; STRANGE IRONY OF WAR ■j A strange irony of the war fans come to William Sellick, a disabled ex-ser-viceman at Kettering, Northamptonshire./ He is curator of two German guns of the type that maimed him. He ele’ans rhese war trophies belonging to the town and tends flowers plantea round’them. “.Bill” ,was partly paralysed ii> a shrapnel bombardment.

The Weak '"Evtry Picturt ..■—> “ Story." A/MAN’S or woman’s weak spot is frequently the kidneys, the organs, which are so quickly affected by strain or worry and by colds or chills.’! is why sharp, stabbing pains bi the back, ’ urinary disorders, dropsical swellings, headaches, dizzy attacks and rheumatic twinges are so common just now. treatment may temporarily i?4lieve some of these discomthe only safe way to get wellaiyi Ifeep well is to strengthen the weakened kidneys with Doan’s Backs} -he Kidney Pills. This special kidnej? tonic has a unique record of success in overcoming rheumatism, lumbago, sciatica, renal dropsy, urinal irregularities and bladder disorders Ay'' • i* ■ •' Be sure to insist upon Backache Kidney Pills “1^ EAVER” Is the only sauce I dare give father. Tomato and Worcester. Real appetisers. New Zealandmade.