Odds and Ends.

Te Aroha News, Volume XXII, Issue 42787, 5 October 1905, Page 4

Odds and Ends.

A Grand Time.—Mrs Grogan: Th Finnigans must have Had a grand toime t’th’parthy lasht hoight.” . Mrs I)uwan: “Pid Bridget Pmnigan tell ye so?” MrsCrogan : "Niver a whishper; but she sint over this marnin’g early to borry th’ loan av ine bottle av anxiety.” Unlucky Day, Friday.—lt was Monday morning and the rent-collector was pursuing his fell task. His,bag vias getting heavier, but his heait was light, till he reached the house of Mrs Sandish. Master Sandish opened tho door here, and with the air of one who has learned his message well, he said : “Mither and faither’s oot. Will

you please call on Friday.” “ H’m !” said the collector. He would have said more, but it did not seem of much use. ;Then a thougth struck him, “ And why on Friday, my little / man ?” . “ That’s what I dinna keD,” said the little man, “ unless it’s because we be gaun tae flit nn Thursday.” No Use Bothering.—The , cricket season of a town, club recently, started with a grand : two days’ match;/ Great preparations were made, and the services of a local publican, who boasted of being an ex-groundman from Lord’s, were enlisted as umpire. Unfortunately, owing to the wet wicket, the match seemed likely to fluish on the first day, as by lunch time each of the teams had completed i single innings. On resumption, one of the bowLpra made several appeals for “ leg but the decision was always m the batsman’s favour. « How’s that, then 1” he asked tn umphantly, as he at.last scattered the dumps. . ' <<No ball!” roared the umpire, and it ain’t no use for you to keep •in bo herin’, young fellow. This here match has got to last the two days out. That’s my refreshment yonder.”