Airy Nothings.

Te Aroha News, Volume XXII, Issue 42775, 7 September 1905, Page 4

Airy Nothings.

Teacher—We are here in this world to help others. Small Boy—Then; what/, are] the •* others ” here for ,?? >;’yd> . ; Stout Gent—What will you takp me to the station; cabby ? Oußby' (with rpspecc for htesprings)—A lorry. I ■ Bir 'i rt: He—l was an intimate friend of your. ... ? late husband Can’t you give me thing to remember- him.*,by ? She (shyly)—How would X do;?,, ~; r ; ) He—Won’t you favour me With’just .one little kiss before I go?- She—not me. -1 would’nt pucker my lips formless than a dozen. ! “ Hard, drinking has. lost him nis money and his reputation as well, r 1 Not altogether .” No No ; he (.till has his reputation for hard chink*’ %•” •.! V . ‘ Jorkins—My l dear, I wish, you •* would’nt sing that song about ' Falling (low.’ Mrs J—Why uot ? Jorkins— a. It reminds me too much of-. the ;-house j ; rent. •••:/) .** L “ What do you do for a living, my •: :uan?’ ‘‘l’m a travelling ’utndrist ; - i uum! ’ ‘ A humorist ? f * Yes.'mum. I goes about looking for work! ’ Jack Ford—Did you bee- that girl cut me then ? Frank Wilcocx —I no»ic d she didn’t bow. Jack Ford—And « ; vat Isaved her life! Frank Wilcox IIow? Jack Ford-We were engaged, and finally she said she’d rather die than marry me, so I let her off. ; American Daughter—Oh, papa, the duke has proposed *o me l Papa T[ e has! “ Yes papa. And he says : lean wear a coronet 1 Here’the pawn ticket for it.’ “Well, Wilkins, did you see the doctor?” “Yus, sir!’ ‘And what did lie say was the matter with you?’ Please, sir, he said it was general ability, sir 1’ Irish Lawyer to witness —Now, sir, ; are you prepared to swear that you ~: were present when my client knocked you down ? Tom —You say that the bride and bridegroom looked nice, What about the guests? Will—Oh, they took the cake! - • > Jinks—Did they hang your picture in that Western exhibition? Dauber —No; they threatened to hang me instead! Mrs Wearyun—l’m sorry I ever mar* lied such alazy man. Wearjun —I’m not lazy, my dear. I simply don’t want to injure my health by working between meals. Lady Caller—ls Mrs Newqome at home ? Irish M *id Servant—Wait. a moment, mum. till I get a look atyez. If you’ve a big nose and a cast in the right eye, she isn’t, ■/.