Wit and Humour.

Te Aroha News, Volume XIV, Issue 2104, 17 May 1898, Page 3

Wit and Humour.

-A NOVEL .FOOTBALLER ? Some soldiers once visited the Zoeloglical: Gardens. One ©fthem on seeing a zebra washeard to r remark: ‘‘Blowpipe ,if that? taint old Cafit'n Binks’spony with a football jersey ©n.” , ::: " IRISH AGAIN . V ' Drill-Instructor (tolriah reeruit,wifch whom he had at hut lost all patience): “As you were !” " Irish recruit: “ I’m blissed if I know how I were?” - ‘ ' THE WORD QF COMMAND. _ ; A short time ago, whilst a certain general the march, at'-Malta, he asked a young wh'af wbuld be hisnextcom-. xpHrif ha wds in command of a regiment gggg&ing over a plain in a hostile country, and he found his front -blocked by artillhiy, a brigade of cav< airy on his right, a lake oh his left* and '/©at off by infantry. “ flaii I order arms, ground Arms, kneel down, say your prayers, ” replied the subaltern. '• y ‘ - ' THE REASON WHY. r The sheepro&Afgh&nistan are famed for the great size and fatness of tdeir tails. -y/;; 1 ' ' . A lot purchased by : the commissariat in India, having been brought into camp to be slaughtered for the soldiers two Irishmen stood regarding them. * I’m a-thinkin’, Larry, how do they get them big tails f exclaimed one {of them. ‘ Aisy enough, my boy. Don’t you see, they do always be grazing uphill in thesamountainous counthries, and by coarse fall the ; fat runs down into their tails.’ * -