Others.

Te Aroha News, Volume VII, Issue 431, 25 December 1889, Page 4

Others.

Physician— « My friend, I fear that youhave got water on the brain." Patient — 4 Water your reasons for thinking bo ?' The physician fainted. A political speaker said — 'I know nc? east, no south, no west, no north.' * Then/ said an auditor, * you had better go home and learn geography.' j Patient (to dentist) : • The tooth next to that 'un aches too, doc' Dentist : • Yes, it aches in sympathy.' Patient : ' Yank it out ; durn such sympathy.' Milton was asked if ho intended, to instruct his daughters in the different languages, to which he replied, • No, sir ; one tongue is sufficient for a woman.' Young physician (pompously) — * Yes,. I've called at Air Brown's three times a day for a week. He is a very sick man, Miss Smith.' Miss Smith — • He must be by thistime.' Seedy - looking individual approaching busy merchant—' Will you be kind enough, sir, to give a poor fellow a lift ?' Merchant- —' Certainly ; James, show the gentlemanto the elevator.' A student told a professor that a barrel of ale found in his room had proved ao beneficial to him, that whereas two days before he could hardly lift it, he could now lift it with ease. First Farmer's Boy—' My father's goingto have some men do thrashing at our house next week.' Second farmer's boy— 1 That'snothin'. My father does thrashin' at. our house every day.' Boy — • Mamma, am I made out of onions, sage, sorrel, and bread crumbs ?' Mamma • Mercy, no ! What do you mean V Boy — 1 Johnnie Jones said he was going to knock the stuffing out of me.'

A private letter received from Mr John? Dillon states that the amount received in New Zealand as towards the evicted Irish. Tenants' Fund' is £6,000. The, result ha* in every way exceeded his expectations. Auckland heads the list of the amount contributed. Mr Dillon says his largest meeting was that held uTDunedin, the Garrison* being literally overflowing. , Mr; Dillon will remain in Dunedin till the 24th > December, leaving there for Wellington and! ' Napier, proceeding on to the Hot Lakes. The delegates expect to be in Auckland* about the Ist of January.

12. Cry-Tear-I-on. (Criterion.) 13. Sand Witch. (Sandwich.) 14. Semi-Terry. (Cemetery.) 15. i-rate. (Irate.) 16. Snap-Drag-on. (Snapdragon.} 17. Glass-Here. (Glacier.)