An Old Settler's First Experience of a Yankee Railroad.

Te Aroha News, Volume VII, Issue 392, 10 August 1889, Page 6

An Old Settler's First Experience of a Yankee Railroad.

" I'm gwine to Staunton-to my grandson's, Pete Rawlins," said an old man in a long yellow coat and a billy-goat beard. " Know him?" " Nope," said the conductor. " Know any of his folks down ,in Staun« ton?" Just' then the whistle blew, and the old man jumped up and tried to get past the conductor, who held him down by main Strength. The white hair of the old " cracker" fairly stood on end, and ifc was several minutes before he calmed down enough to count his change. ( At the next station, when tho train stopped, ho gathered up his' belongings and made for the door ; but was stopped before he could get off. This attempt he made at every station, and finally, the conductor wont to him, saying : '* Look'here old man, you jist sit still and don't move.till you hear the brakeman holler Staunton,then you get oft ! See ?' Kg .«at there awhile quietly, and then began to question the rest of the passengers as to their acquaintance with Staunton and it? people. Thinking 1 coulrl derive some entertain ment from him, I changed my sd,itto,thc> tront of his, and, burning round, addressed some words to him with an amiable andseductive smile. He looked at me a moment and solemnly took his musty leather wallet from his side pocket and thrust it deep down into his boot, saying": " Now, then, young man, what \on want to know, eh ':' This action set the entire car full of people roaring with laughter and almost brought a blush to my cheek, which sensation had scarcely gone when the brakeman opened tho dooi and yelled, " Staunton !" We were at the moment crossing a, tieatle, about fifty feet in height, upon the slanting heavily wooded ■sideof a mountain. We could look down the hillside over the tree tops and see a silvery stream threading its winding; way through a black and dark swamp. The old cettler rose quickly at the sound of *-he brakeman's voice, packed up hia belongings, and, going to the platform,, stepped right ofT. As we passed we got one glimpso of him sailing down. Somebody pulled the bellrope, stopping tho train at once, and a re lief party was .organised, which went down the mountain side until wo came to the spot where he struck first, a tall hemlock. It looked like a gigantic Christmas tree. Pendent from its branches were socks, collars, handkerchiefs, chewing tobacco, chickens, rolls of butter, fancy goods, ham .sandwiches, boots and shoes, notion?, suspenders, shoe laces, bandboxes, samples of cloth, hardware, and gents' furnishing goods. Further down the hillside we found some patent medicine bottles, the old am brella, the butter crock, and the plug hat. Then we reached the old man, who was up to his waste in black mud, busily engaged in washing the same mud from a whisky ' Hash which he had somehow managed to retain in his pocket through all his exciting flight. He was as cool as a cucumber, and, when we yanked him out of the mud, remarked, "This yere railroad travelling do beat hell, don't it ?" We climbed up bbs hill, gathering his belongings as we proceeded, and when we arrived at the train the conductor angrily inquired, " What in thunder did you mean by jumping off like that?'' "' Why, my.friend," blandly answered he of the goat like beard and shattered garments, "you told me yourself-to get off when I heard the brakeman holler ' Staunton,' and I got oft."