Fact and Fiction.

Te Aroha News, Volume VI, Issue 323, 8 December 1888, Page 6

Fact and Fiction.

' S V said Macaulay's New Zealand er, a% 'ie |>iesc»ted his letter of introduction to -he iioaxl of an American housiho d : ' my 01 iiu-ipal object in coining to this new ;ounfry of yours is to study your peculiar 3 ooi"il customs, especially in the matter of sou rt- hip. From what I have reutl in thaN r ew»pupers of your nation, I pather that; you havecertain ideas in common wuhsome ot the tribes in the Interior of A<rica. ] lta % ik tor instance, that when a joung man ippeurs as the suitor of a youuer woman of <<ui table age and position, it is the duty of ihe father of the maiden to intercept him at; 1jhb duor, and. after Kicking him violently, to -<eL a ferocious bull-dog upon him. The pivicfcire, t piesume, is de-igned to test the • .iepth of his devotion and his capacity tor silent endurance and manly aglility — ' 4 Hold !' cried the head of the American iioust'hokl, in profound astonishment. 'Sir, you are certainly misinformed, or el?e you have mistaken the country. I mys-elf am i.he father of seven not unattractive • daughters, to whom I shall be pleased to.' pi osent you, for I assume from the wealth ■iiid elegance of your tattoor marks that you i must be a personage of affluence and social' distincjon in your own land. Each one of.i them will welcome you .with a pleasanc siliile, and any evening that you may wish' \d call on any one of them, her Mother and I ,v. ill gladly sit out on the back btoop and .li^ht niosqiiitos, thereby affording you un-,, disturbed possession of the front parlour," with free control of the gas : and, should.y^urie&ire it, a light refection mill be sorvat fttf wbatovor hour you -may iname. I may,•a<;id that' all my daughters aregood house- 1 , keepers, and that if tie eldest is, a trifle-' beyond tho first blush of youth, yet it is, well nab to underestimate the charms of. mature experience and*.a patient and resigned frame of mind*: .

A volunteer captain, ,on receiving » not§> frjorn.a lady requesting the " pleasure of hi«.,(, company," uriderstood.it as acomplimentrto^*, ffchos.e under his coipmand > -andfmarched 1 ,tK<>r'f "whole of tljem to the lady's^houae. h i . , ,, ! iBride:, "Henry, do. know; ; that; r you. y snore f\ Bridegroom : '• No ; do I ? I?mjvery f .r* sorry to' hear it. Bride> (dryly) : «• " am T , t 1." , . A traveller. > in describing a tropical t-j, } shower,) says : — " The raindrops ..were- ex- 1 , trjerhely large, ,varying in six© from » &hii ?^, ,ling,{o ple'h^ienpence.- 3 ! ? , , , , „ , ; ,^ '