WHY IT STOPPED. An Englishman Encounters an American Conductor.

Te Aroha News, Volume VI, Issue 312, 31 October 1888, Page 3

WHY IT STOPPED. An Englishman Encounters an American Conductor.

lx Texas. A railway train stopped in a &\vamp, and while a blended expression O£ weariness and di&gust was sitting on the 1 passengers' faces, the conductor came into a car where a recently arrived Englishman safe. ' Guaul,' said the Englishman, e may I speak to you a moment V ' What did you call me ?' ' I called you the guard, for aren't you the guard ?' ' Guard, the deuce ! Do you take thftj for a convict train, that we have to keep guards?' ' Oh, no, no, no, I didn't mean that, but, 'owever, we will not argue that point, but will you please answer me one question V ' Spit it out !' ' Weil, wat arc we stopping here for ?' ' There's a frog in the switch,' the conductor replied. ' A frog in the switch ?' 'Yes.' ' I really don't understand you. 1 ' I reckon not.' ' But will you please explain a frog in a switch ? I know what a frog is, but w'y you should stop on account of a frog being in a switch or anywhere else is something I cannot fathom, you know.' ' I can't explain it,' the conductor replied. 'But you can tell me why you stop on account of a frog ?' ' No ; it's against our orders to give away such information.' ' Well, that is viry, viry queer, you know. W'y in England we would not think for a moment of stopping a train on account of a hog. I must say that you Americans have some very ridiculous customs.' ' Needn't say it unless you want to,' replied the conductor, as he slyly winked at a porter. 'Eh, yes, lam compelled to say it. On account of a frog. Well, well, I never heard of such a thing. I knew that the Americans held up the frog in superstitious veneration By George, I must make a note of this. lam writing a^ bock on America, and this id the most peculiar thing I've found in this crude but wonderful country.'