Some Bald-Headed Chestnuts of the Past Conturies. MEDIEVAL JOKES.

Te Aroha News, Volume V, Issue 221, 24 September 1887, Page 7

Some Bald-Headed Chestnuts of the Past Conturies.

MEDIEVAL JOKES.

Thehe is a curious little work, the contents pf which are to have been collected by Hans Sachs-, the Nuremberg cobbler and master singer* in 151-7, says a writer in " Chora bers's journal." This curious book was reprinted several times, in the sevenj teenth and early part of the eighteenth centuries, bgt is now somewhat scarce. Ifc was issued without place of publication or publisher's name, in small form, without cover. The book pretends to have been prepared by Hans Sachs for his private use, that ho might make merriment among his friends when drinking, and they wero tired of his songs. It does not contain any anecdotes ; it is made up of a collection of riddles more or less good, some coarse and some profane ; but the ago was not squeamish. The title under which the little work was issued was, " Useful Tablu-taik, or Something for all : that is, the Happy Thoughts, good and bad, expelling melancholy and cheering Spirits, of Hilarious Wish-wash, Master-tiler at Kielen-hauson." The book consists of ju&t 100 pages, of which a quarter arc consumed by profaces, introductions, etc., and about thirteen filled with postcripts and index. The humours of the book aie somewhat curious ; for instance, in the preliminary index of subjects it gives — "IX. The reason why this book of table-talk was so late in being published." When we turn to the place indicated for the reason, avc find a blank. There is no such reason. There is a fulsome and absurd dedication to the " Honorable and Knightly Tile burner," who lives "By tho icy ocean near Mosccv, in Lapland, one mile from Podolia and three miles above it." Although we are not told in the placo indicated why. the little collection was not issued immediately after the death of Hans Sachs, nor among hisAVOiks, we learn fche leason elsewhere, in the preface, where Aye are told that the jokes it contained were so good that a rivalry ensued among them as to precedence, and till this was settled it was impossible to get the book printed. The collection contains in all 196 riddles. Among them is that which gives the date of the book, and that is a chronogram : " When was this book of table-talk drawn up?— A.— ln letzlgta Vsen I) fllnffkVn Derfc slbenzehen Den lahr " (1517). Here aie some of the conundrums : Q. — After Adam had eaten the forbidden fruit, did he stand or bit down? A.— Neither; befell. Q. — Two shephei'ds were pasturing their Uocke. Said one to the other: "Give me one ot your sheep, then I shall have twice as many sheep a* you." " Not so," replied the second herdsman ; " give me one of yours and then we shall have equal flocks." How many sheep had each? A.— One had .seven, the other live. If the first took a sheep out of the flock of the second he had eight, the other foui ; if contraiy, each had six. Q.—What is four times six? A.— 6666. Q.— What does a goose do when standing on one leg? A. — Holds up the other. Q.— When did carpenters first proclaim themselves to be intolerable dawdles ? A. — When building the ark— they took a hundred years over it. Q. — (Jnder what law are the soldiers? A. — Can(n)on law. Some of the riddles have survived in the jocular mouth to tho present day. For instance, who does not know this : Q — What smells most in an apothecary's shop ? A. — The nose. There is one conundrum that surprises us. The story was wont to be told by Bishop Wilberforce that he had asked a child in Sunday school as by the angels ascended and descended on Jacob's ladder, Avhereupon the child replied that they did so because they wer« moulting and could not fly. But this appears in Hans Sachs's book, and is evidently a very ancient joke indeed. In this collection also appears tho very heavy riddle : " Which is heaviest, a pound of lead or a pound of feathers ?" winch every one knows, but with an addition, which is an improvement. After the answer, ''Each weighs a pound, and they are equal in -weight," the questioner says further: " Not. so, try in water. The pound of feathers will float, and the pound of lead will sink." Q._ How can you carry a jug of Avatcr in your haads on a broiling summer day, in the full blaze of the sun, so that the water shall not get hotter? A—Let the water be boiling when you fill the jug. Q.— Hoav can a farmer prevent the mice from stealing his corn? A.— By giving them his corn. A. -A certain man left a penny by his Avill to be divided equally among his fifty relatives, each to have as much as the other, and each to be quite contented Avith Avhat he got, and not envy any of the legatees. How did the executor comply Avith this testamentary disposition? A.— He bought a packet of fifty tin tacks Avith the penny and hammered one into the back of each of the legatees.