ODE TO SAUSAGES.

Taihape Daily Times, Volume 7, Issue 243, 3 July 1915, Page 3

ODE TO SAUSAGES.

! THE GERMAN VARIETY. (Laugh loud). Eh! (Laugh). Hello people, how are you? Now, look here. I'm going to sing you a little ballad but I'm not going to worry you -with love. Love's all right , but what's the good of it? You can't see it. you can't go into a shop and buy it like you can tripe, and what's the good of it when you've go no boots to wear ami you're hungry. Why not sing abo-it trousers; They are useful, but love isn't. Nov,-, the ballad I'm going to slug to you is on a sensible subject, too, and now I'm going to show you why food is superior to love. Now, I shouldn't like to be in love, myself. I don 'I mind being in gaol, in debt, or indecent, but to be in love 1 should go up in a sausage roll. (Laugh.) That reminds me. What finer subject in the world is there than sausages? If I were a poet I'd write a poem and call it "The Ode to the Pork Butcher." I've owed him a bit lately, too. (Laugh). But there—er—here it is. , and you 've only got to keep it. You know what a sausage is—one of those ' long things. You keep it for a couple of weeks and it will take to you, and fellow you about like an old friend. This is the ballad—its so sweet. Those who like it will signify their approval in the usual manner. Those who don't like it will have to put up with it. Play me some music, will you.

When the sunny moonbeams flittered in a sausage-shop 1 stood; When the rosy dewdrops glittered thought I "Ain't those Germans good." (That's lovely, isn't it good." (That's lovely, isn't it.)' Then a kind of fascination held me smeMbouml and I stopped; Then a kind of inspiration on an ode somehow I cepped. (Oh. that's lovely, isn't it? The wording, I think, is so pretty, isn't it? But listen to the chorus): Sausages for breakfast, sausages for tea, Sausages and sausages and saugages for me. Cheese and bread is very nice, and so is bread and cheese, But if you want to win my heart, why give me sausages. (That's rather a long stop, isn't if (Laughs). Homeward comes the weary fathei when he thinks he'll homeward come., Homeward comes the weary fathe r when his weary work, is done; Then his wife and all his nippcrj gather round him, don't you ki.ow. "What lias pa. brought with him—-kip-pers?"—no. oh no, oh no, v.-hot oh! (Repeat chfeius , (insert "'".IV onions. '')