Heart and Home Chats

Sun (Auckland), Volume IV, Issue 1008, 26 June 1930, Page 6

Heart and Home Chats

Amne Ratledge

By

Alisa Anne Rutledge toili answer letters in this column every Thura (ley An accomplished writer an ardent feminist. a student of human nature and a wide traveller she is well fitted for the task Those who have problems and tack o confidante to help in (heir solution may with confidence write to AJiss Rutledge whose knowledoe will bt placed at their disposal A sym pathetlo woman she will assist those who stand tn need of assist ance Communications for MistRutledge, should be addressed tc THE $177 N offire

HEARTS OR SPADES?

to offer some help, as I do not Avaut to leave a stone unturned to get things back to their former footing? joybet/

Dear Miss Rutledge,-—-L am in love with a farmer who is a nice young man with very decided views on certain subjects. He speaks frequently of marriage, but appears to hold back because I am a city girl and have never lived in the country. I am not sure how 1 shall like country life, and do not give my friend ail the encouragement he would like for this reason. Can you help me? HEARTS FOR TRUMPS. .t XSWER Your difficulty is experienced by many other city gills. Much trouble anrl many bitter regrets arising from luck of foresight attend the blending of city and * ountry-bred people. Of course, country life varies with the class of farm and environment, and there is a world of difference between a small farm with poor buildings and equipment, and the prosperous holding with the comfortable home fitted with up-to-dnte conveniences teached by a good road. .Motor-ears make a difference, too. There is a gulf between the domestic life on dairy farms where good milking machines are used and where they are not. Wireless has made a. great difference to the lot of families on the land. In the closelysettled farming districts there is a certain amount of enjoyable, if simple, social life, which presents a pleasurable contrast to an isolated farm perhaps served by bad loads. r have often thought that farmers way back should have more generous treatment in the matter of roads. Your duty is clear. Investigate the kind of lire you might lie’ asked to experience. Arrange to visit your friend in the cotiuuy if practicable. Readjustment does not always come easily, and while vou are buoyed and stimulated by the. sudden visits a'nd loveletters of your country friend, you have little or no chance of discovering: what lies before you over the “razor-backs,’' unless you tak<- a preliminary skirmishing n ip. Be very sure that country ‘lift: "■’ill satisfy your m-f-ds before vou gi\-.-y<>ut* friend his answer, else instead of Hearts for Trumps” may come plenty of hard work with " Spades” us the trump ANNE RUTLEDGE. HER PROPOSAL Dear Miss Rutledge,— I am a lonely old maid of 38, and 1 have never had a proposal of marriage until recently when, much to my surprise, a distant friend of a married brother, -whom I befriended because he seemed to hunger for a little human sympathy, asked me to marry him. This man was divorced by his first wife some years ago for neglect. He is 45 years of age. f have never taken him seriously, and don’t know Avliy he should want me to marry him as I am quiet and home-loving. I am certainly not in love with him, but as T get so lonely. I wonder Avhether I should marry him. RED-WING. ANSWER The proof of the pudding is undoubted y m the .-ating, hut I feel that you will, somehow, bo wasted on this man. even though, he may have decided to mend his ways and settle down with a home-laving companion for the rest of his days. Why not continue to sit on the sideline until a better and more promising companion comes your way, or wait until you really care enough for this man to overlook the past and build for the future? ANNE RUTLEDGE. GREEN-EYED Dear Miss Rutledge,— I have been very interested in your columns, and have tioav decided to ask your advice on a subject that has been worrying me lor some time. 1 used to be very friendly with a girl whom I greatly admired until one evening, when she heard that I had met another girl, she became extremely jealous, and ever since has •otally changed toward me. 1 would do anything in the world to Avin back the old friendship, but explanations do not seem to help, or anything else that is in my power to break down the barrier. Do you think it possible

Some men arc wise, ami some are very much otherwise, when it comes to the all-absorbing question of love. Now, if I were in your shoes, I think a little of the wise treatment would work the oracle. Casual indifference and apparent lack of interest in the young woman’s affairs might possibly fan the spark of interest she has for you into flame, for if she thought that she was going to lose you altogether, she might gradually come round. If you are impatient to see how this plan works, try the effect of one or two unexpected meetings. Misunderstandings are always hard to clear up, but if you apply the old adage, “Where tin-re’s a will there’s a way,” with earnest consistency, I am convinced that your love affair will have a promising ending, and you will “both live happily ever after.” ANNE RUTLEDGE. TIME TO LEAVE! Dear Miss Rutledge,— My husband treats me with great cruelty, and refuses to allow me money for housekeeping. During out married life of 11 years, he has repeatedly made the Avorst accusations against me, and upon occasion has locked me out of the house. Once he threw a bucket of water over me. I have put up with it so long because of my little girl, aged nine. However, things are growing worse, so perhaps you can tel me Avhat to do? BROKEN-HEARTED. ANSWER Where is your pride and womanly dignity? Wake up and realise that this is the age of woman’s emancipation from the yoke with which she has been burdened for so many centuries. If you submit to this kind of treatment, you are making yourself a living sacrifice for the sake of your child. Later on. she may not thank you for this, and you might give her a better chance in the world if you take her away now arid live your own life, free from the tyranny of such If you have an eye to the future, be advised, and consult a, good solicitor as to the best thing to do, and do it without delay. ANNE RUTLEDGE. A RED NOSE Dear Miss Rutledge,— I am not at all popular with the opposite sex—probably because I have a red nose. Girl friends decline to accompany me in public, and I am the butt of much good-natured jest because of this drawback. I am much troubled because I do not touch alcohol, and therefore cannot understand the cause of the affliction. Hoping that you can help me. TROUBLED. ANSWER Lf you are to remedy the trouble, avoid all false stimulants such as coffee or tea, and begin each day by sipping a glass of warm water in which a lemon has been squeezed half an hour before breakfast. During meal times, eat your food slowly and carefully masticate it. Go in for fresh, juicy fruit and vegetables, cooked or raw, and do not. drink with your meals. Take plenty of open air exercise systematically, and try the exhilarating influence of warm salt water baths followed by tepid showers and a brisk rub down with a rough towel. Poor digestion and poor circulation may be the cause of your trouble, therefore do not hesitate to consult a good physician if you are unable to overcome it Avith the above treatment. ANNE RUTLEDGE. TO REMOVE MILDEW ANSWER TO NANCY The following are two inexpensive and infallible ways to remove mildew:—Make a paste of fuller’s earth powder and kerosene, put on to the stain and rub lightly. Repeat if necessary,’ and after leaving in the sun to dry, brush off. This remedy should be used for white materials, such as linen, only:—Put Mb of chloride of lime into a gallon of cold water, and leave it lor an hour. Then pour off the clear liquid, and soak the linen in it for two hours. Be sure to rinse well before exposing to the sun. ANNE RUTLEDGE. IN BRIEF it.YffUTB TO ‘‘FALLING HAIR." Apparently the dandruff and dryness of the scalp that you mention, is responsible for your falling hair, and I recommend the following ointment to help you to overcome the difficulty: Mix well together five parts of coconut oil, five parts of castor-oil, five parts of flowers of sulphur and one part of friar’s balsam. Rub into the scalp once or twice weekly, and follow each application with a good shampoo a few days later. ANNE RUTLEDGE. ANSWER TO “BELLE” Essence of lemon has been used with great success for removing paint from white silk garments. ANNE RUTLEDGE. ROTORUA WOMEN’S HOCKEY From Our Own Correspondent ROTORUA, Today. New officers were elected to carry on work in connection with the Rotorua Ladies' Hockey Association last evening, occasioned by the resignation of Mr. A. C. Watts, who for the la.st three years has worked zealously as secretary, treasurer, referee and selector. A fully representative meeting of seven clubs moved that a letter of thanks bo forwarded to Mr. Watts and that his resignation be received with regret. New officers appointed were:—Secretary, Mr. Reed (Mamaku); treasurer, Miss Iv. Carnachan; assistantseer etary, Miss E. Schadick; selector. Mr. C. Mitchell. Mr. Roberts, of the Railway Booking Bureau, was present, and outlined arrangements he had made for the travelling accommodation of the Rotorua team to the championship meeting at Invercargill. Mr. F. Reed has been appointed manager of the travelling team and Miss K. Carnachan chaperone. The final of the Robertson Cup could not be played on Saturday owing to the condition of the ground, and it has been decided to postpone that match until July 12. The WairuaArangi Cup competition will be commenced next Saturday. The draw is as follows:—Xgongotaha v. Whippets, at Rotorua, 3 p.m., referee Mr. C. Mitchell; Mamaku v. Arawa, at Mamaku, referee Mr. F. Reed; Putaruru v. Shamrocks, at Putaruru, referee Mr. White; Taniwha, a bye. Arrangements were made for public competitions to raise funds for the South Island trip.