Heart and Home Chats

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 878, 23 January 1930, Page 6

Heart and Home Chats

By

Anne Rutledge

Miss A nne Rutledge t Dili answer letters in this column every Thursday An accomplished t enter, an ardent feminist, a student of human nature and a wute traveller she is well fitted tor the task. Those who have terns and lack a confidante to hr Ip in their solution may with confidence write to Miss Rutledge, whose knowledge will be placed at their disposal A sympathetic woman, she will assist those who stand In need of assistance. Communications for Aliss Rutledge should be addressed to THE HUN office.

AN OLD STORY Dear Miss Rutledge: I am very troubled about a dear friend of mine, who of late years has j had the misfortune to be considerably reduced in circumstances, and spends most of her time fretting and pining after former glories. In her particu lar case, she has reason to feel hurt because friends, who knew her in the days of her prosperity, now seem to have forgotten her existence. As I should like to help cheer her up, perhaps you will be good enough to tell me how? “FRIENDSHIP.” ANSWER The world is crowded with fair-weather acquaintances, people who will enjoy one’s hospitality to the full, until the day dawns when adversity holds sway—then, H is a case of “look the other way!” Sad but true, and in the main, much of our present-day living consists of this casual flotsam and jetsam, and the lack of true breeding and character. 'Twas ever thus, for we read in Shakespeare, “But yesterday the word of Caesar might have stood against the world. Now lies he there and none so poor to do him reverence.” Let us hope that the progress of civilisation will gradually evolve a more satisfactory scheme of things so that the god Mammon will not figure so much as the “sounding board” of one’s social standing and leadership, and that a more creative order, where brains, ability and culture will hold the reins, will put an end to Mammon’s long career. Comfort your friend by assuring her that true happiness is more likely to come her way by pouring forth the mill: of human kindness instead of mourning the passing of the golden calf.' Although there are people without background, who are forced to build up foreground, thinking snobbery their ablest ally, one must recognise that there are also true, loyal-hearted friends in our midst, and there is much kindness and love, given unstintingly, that is never advertised. ANNE RUTLEDGE. SHIPWRECK Dear Miss Rutledge,— For some time past my husband has been keeping company with a married woman and his attitude toward me is distinctly cold and indifferent. As I can no longer bear this and as it is clear that he no longer cares for me I would like you to advise me what to do. We have one child, a little boy, and whatever I do it will be done for his sake. Trusting that you will be able to help me. “TROUBLEb WIFE.” AWSIVEK if a reconciliation is out of the question, then the only tiling to do is to secure a. legal separation, arul an adequate living allowance according to the position of your husband. The question of divorce Is entirely a matter for you to decide, but consult a first-class lawyer over jour affairs, as it pays to get things • lone properly, especially when you have The education and future of your boy to consider. ANNE RUTLEDGE. THE STEPMOTHER Dear Miss Rutledge,— My position is a very trying one, for I know that my sister’s children are being harshly handled and abused with an ill-tempered nagging tongue when they are naughty, by an inexperienced stepmother. When my sister was alive, she was a wonderful mother and the children were comparatively well behaved, and adorable, but since her death they have been subjected to such treatment that they are not getting a fair chance. Do you think that children should be caned and smreked when naughty? ANXIOUS. ANSWER it is unpleasant to hear in this enlightened age that children are still receiving harsh treatment physically and mentally, very often owing to a deplorable lack of understanding of the parents. Where children and babies are concerned, during the last 10 years or sc, a new trail has been blazed with better results so far as the health and happiness of parents and their offspring are concerned. The narrow and warped minds of parents can seriously affect the well-being and future of children, and it should be borne in mind that their healthy ideas and vision must be encouraged and certainly not stunted. It is shameful that such a woman should be influencing and affecting tender young lives, for swifter than a weaver’s shuttle flies, these discordances make a wrong impression on the budding mind of childhood. Unfortunately, too, there is also abroad the type of human being who being unsuccessful in some of the day's undertakings, seeks to restore his sense of self-esteem, and so “takes it out of” little Elsie, or bullies and beats six-year-old Tom. Children should be lovingly taught what Is right and wrong, and also obedience. If necessary to get discipline in case of wilful disobedience,

etc., it is just -<ls well to wake lip the child, with a sharp spank, but it is most important that the child the reason of the punishment, and that parents control themselves, for they are foolish and weak if they "lose their tempers” as some do. In the case you mention, you can help by your loving but firm attitude to the children when you visit. Why not haye a tactful talk to the husband, who, unless he is exceptional, must love his children. If the ill-treatment is extreme, you may feel disposed to approach the proper authorities. ANNE RUTLEDGE. FAITH HEALING Dear Miss Rutledge,— I was surprised to read the other day that Dean Inge of London ridiculed modern faith healing as a fashionable craze. I have been impressed by what I had heard about faith healing and I would like to know your opinion, especially as such a pronouncement from a prominent Churchman like Dean Inge has unsettled me. J.T.D. ANSWER. Faith healing has in recent years experienced a revival in many parts of the world, and there are a great many people benefiting accordingly, including New Zealanders. Frankly, I cannot understand how any Christian who has read the New Testament can ridicule genuine faith healing, and I find it difficult to believe that Dean Inge has expressed himself as you say. Most of the New Testament is teeming with records of faith healing by the followers of the great teacher Jesus Christ, who had an enlightened understanding of man’s relationship to his spiritual creator. The teaching of Jesus Christ is quite plain to anybody who reads it, and to heal sick minds and bodies spiritually is just a matter of the degree of understanding and living the Christian doctrine expounded by the Master. At the same time people should use God-given wisdom and intelligence. For educational purposes particularly, I consider it should be beneficial and illuminating if adults read the New Testament straight through as they would a novel. It is a most extraordinary thing that most people owning a Bible have never read it through, or even any considerable part of it. Many of the churches in New Zealand are giving earnest thought to the subject of th healing, especial!}' since visits of Air. Hickson to this country, and I would advise you to approach any of them for further guidance. ANNE RUTLEDGE. PUZZLEP PLAYWRIGHT Dear Miss Rutledge,— Would you give me the address of ihe Stage Society? I have spent some time -writing a dramatic play, with the .help of various instruction books, and was interested to learn recently that the above society took pride of place in having discovered talented play-writers. I thought, perhaps, that mine might receive fair consideration at their hands, though as yet it has not been offered for publication, as I am a little afraid to send it on until I knew definitely that it would at least be read and perhaps considered. Knowing a friend who is a keen writer of short stories, and knowing also of the bitter rebuffs she has received at the hands of editors and such people, I would be deeply grateful if, in any way, you could advise me correctly as to how to proceed in offering for publication or acceptance It would be simply too heartbreaking to send on the off-chance as my friend has done. I simply am asking for the address or the b>tage Society, when this letter is boiled down to essentials, but would also be glad pf any helpful advice you might be prepared to give, as I think your answers to correspondents are always unusual and highly interesting. J.A. ANSWER Sock!tv ad< \',? a % yo A Te^ e is the Stage 9 Great Newport Street, London, and no doubt these people would give all necessary information regarding how to market a play. 6 b as a Winner of an Austral:!-Man-wide competition arranged bv a Sydney newspaper for the best play, I can tell you frankly that it is a hard matter to break into that class of business unless you are on the spot. If you are really a good writer or dramatist, the best thing you can do }? to employ a first-class agent. If a e-wire agent has "got the goods,” he knows the right people to approach, and is the best man to look after your interests. The Stage Society might recommend agents in London and New York of unquestionable standing. An important point to remember in writing a play is to see that the “mechanics of the play are specially efficient, ie » th at jour characters are brought on and off the stage naturally, and with good effect. You must always have jour eye toward economy as regards production expenses. For instance, it is very convenient for a touring company to have a good play with only one or two scenes.

Regarding your script, judging by the letter you have sent me, I would advise you to give the letters on your tj'pewriter a careful brushing, for the script is not attractive in appearance if the typing is not clean. Also you must watch your punctuation. Editors want the best material for their paper, and any workmanlike contribution with ap-

parent merit is properly read. There is plenty of competitipn in the literary world, and apart from the question of literature, you must "keep on keeping on” to be successful. I know a famous American writer who could practically paper her walls with rejection slips before she “broke into the game.” ANNE RUTLEDGE.