AT THE CROSS-ROADS

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 838, 5 December 1929, Page 6

AT THE CROSS-ROADS

| Dear Miss Rutledge,— l lam 30 years of age, and have been | fond of a young man now for over i four years, but I am not sure of his feelings in the matter. Could you let me know how I can bring the affair to a head tactfully? I am afraid I might lose him if I say anything tc him, and I am also afraid that I am getting too old to let things run on indefinitely. N.A.F. i ANSWER. You are pausing at one of the milestones of life, where it would be better for you to take a hop, skip and jump j and be done with it! In considering the ! future, the time is now ripe for a polite ! "showdown,” for if the man doesn't care for you, the sooner you realise that you have wasted four years of your life the better. I believe that your policy or attitude toward your friend is fundamentally wrong. Surely during the four years you have been friendly lie must have shown by words or deeds that he reciprocates your affection? Further, you should knew whether financial or family circumstances offer any hitch to his matrimonial desires. Have you thought, too, thgt he might be a little shy and you may unconsciously be difficult to approach on such a subject? I have known cases where men in ordinary circumstances love girls whose very appearance, manners and tastes bespeak the constant substantial outlay of £.s.d., and therefore prevent or scare them from aspiring to more than enjoy their company as often as funds will permit. Consider a little whether these circumstances fit your case. Think hard, and don’t be afraid of truth. If your friend is so difficult to approach, and you are too nervous to mention such a legitimate matter, would you be really happy living" with him, or are you blindly refusing to take account of any inharmony? Why not try talking of relatives and friends who are happily married in such a tactful way that it might a conversation along lines that you would wish. Whatever else you do, rejoice m real independence, and then if he really wants your co-operation in marriage, let it be genuine co-operation, and not subservience to another’s testy domination as a never-ending excuse to secure peace. ANNE RUTLEDGE.