Antidote to Divorce

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 806, 29 October 1929, Page 8

Antidote to Divorce

Doctor s Cure for Marriage Failure MARRIAGE and divorce are providing sociologists with some tine thinking today, when they we faced with the growing problem of domestic discontent which ends in matrimonial dissolution. An original theory anent the tragic failure of presentday marriage is advanced by Dr. J. P. Hastings, of Auckland, who, in this article, advocates as the only solution perfect frankness between parent and child, and an apprenticeship over the period of youth for the serious business of marriage.

When Dr. Hastings advocates the complete instruction of the child in questions which intimately concern itself, he does not believe that any good result will be achieved by forcing knowledge upon the juvenile mind. His purpose is to have the inquiries of the children answered frankly and fairly in order that they might understand why they exist, and what is their purpose in life. From the age of three to six, the doctor says, the child is engaged in what science calls “adjusting its ego to its environment,” while in the first seven years , of Its life the foundation of its character is laid. It is all important, then, that absolutely correct lines should be followed in training the outlook of the growing boy or girl. “The recent phenomenally large increase in divorce and domestic infelicity is only a symptom of a deeplyrooted social disease,” Dr. Hastings says, in expounding his theory which, by the way, has been enthusiastically adopted by several branches of the Mothers’ League, an institution under the patronage of Lady Alice Fergusson. FREEDOM OF YOUTH “There are many explanations of the present-day divorce fever. Some say it is due to too early marriage; others to too late marriage; others again attribute it to jazz and the manner in which we live. I believe that marriage is a failure today because it Is based upon an entirely wrong foundation. “An accurate sex knowledge is necessary, but that knowledge must be given at the right time and in the proper manner. Under present-day conditions, children receive this knowledge in the worst possible way, frequently having to rely upon children more precocious than themselves or upon those who are already absorbing a completely wrong viewpoint.” The Increased freedom of youth, the doctor considers, lias resulted in a great deal of moral instability of character, and it is mainly for this reason that he wishes to train youth from the cradle up. for the business of life and marriage, as the apprentice is trained over a period of years for his trade or calling. Just as an

ai'chitect never would erect a rustorey building mion Insecure foundations, so should society make absolutely certain of the material with which it is to build future generations. “We do not entrust an untrained person with dynamite,” the doctor goes on, “but we are today entrusting our children with an inadequate and completely wrong knowledge of themselves, which, from a psychological viewpoint, can be as destructive as dynamite is in the physical sense. “Unfortunately orthodox religion no longer has the controlling power it once had. People are demanding their happiness here and now, and side by side with that demand is the scientific fact that the man or woman who has acquired his or her knowledge in the wrong way will never make an ideal marriage partner. “Under these conditions friction in the home is inevitable, and the result is that the unhappily married person seeks escape through the medium of divorce with a view to finding happiness with another partner. WIDER MATERNAL TRAINING “This question of frank and fair discussion is at the loot of our social problem of marriage aud divorce. If parents were to answer faithfully and truthfully the questions asked by the child, and make of themselves the confidants of their children, the children in turn would reciprocate and discuss only with their parents questions which it is the duty of parents to explain. “From infancy they would regard as sacred those things which are today being soiled In the hands of precocious people, because they would know no other conception of them. “I would advocate an extension of the Plunket Society system of training the regular habits of the child in feeding, sleeping and so on, to include a wider system of maternal training. Qualified medical men would have to organise the campaign and lecture to societies and show mothers the direction in which they should go. In this way would the proper bond of sympathy be created, and the only ultimate solution of this problem be secured. “The nation which first systematically introduces this method of instruction will lead the world in social progress.”