FROM THE WATCH TOWER

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 803, 25 October 1929, Page 10

FROM THE WATCH TOWER

DAMN JED ! “Quite unscientific,” says Dr. J. S. Elliot, president of the B.M.A. (N.Z.), of the Hamilton cancer cure. If your system’s out of tone And. you seek some sure specific, Leave the dangerous thing alone If it isn't scientific. Though -with torment you are wracked And the agony’s terrific, Be suspicious of the fact That the cure’s unscientific. Remedies your mother knew, Anodyne and soporific—• They’re no earthly use to you; They are crude, unscientific. Just consult the B.M.A.— That’s a title honorific— You will get relief—some day From a method scientific, And the fees will be terrific. BARGAINS FOR BATHERS It never rains but it pours. That is why stock damaged by water is now being exhibited for sale at cut rates in one or two stores that suffered in the recent downpour. Quaintly enough some of the damaged stock in one case consists of bathing suits. SAFETY FIRST The various interesting and useful purposes to which wealth can be applied are revealed by an American periodical in a brief reference to Mrs. Edward P. Hutton, the heiress of the millionaire who made those “Post’s Toasties” we remember occasionally having for breakfast. Mrs. Hutton owns 35 cars, including six Rolls Royces. When she went to a wedding recently she drove to the Grand Central Station, New York, in one of her Rolls-Royces, rode 28 miles to Pleasantville in her own luxurious private railway carriage, and was met at Pleasantville by other Rolls-Royces she had sent ahead. On this occasion observers noted with no little sadness that her private railway car did not have an empty baggage car behind, the usual Hutton precaution against rear-, eud collisions. TO WRESTLE OR NOT The Women’s Christian Temperance Union has now interested itself in wrestling. This does not mean that the committee of the W.C.T.U. will he along in force to applaud the gladiators at the next exposition of the gentle art. The interest is purely subjective. The union fears some demoralising influence as a result of the use of the hall for these purposes. It is not apparent to those who have seen the matches that they will demoralise the public any more than football matches, boxing exhibitions, croquet tournaments, and other displays of scientific brutality. On the other hand, wrestlers are the most temperate of men. They could not remain in their arduous occupation if they did not rigidly forswear the grape, the hop, and every other alcoholic vegetable, even unto the juniper and the rye. Hence one would expect to find champions of temperance lauding them as models of manhood. In any case, there appears to be no danger that next Monday’s match will be stopped. Mr Baildon says the City Council has received no report calling for interference, and he should know. He usually has a ring-side seat. . THE WISDOM OF WANGANUI “Where is Wanganui; anyway?” was the painful question submitted by a recent correspondent. It occurs to an impartial observer that this query might well be directed to the Auckland Competitions Society, which has brought most of its judges from that town. Three of the four judges are certainly from there, and in the ease of the fourth, it is rumoured that Wanganui is also his original and perhaps is still his spiritual home. Since none will deny the wisdom of the judges, whose remarks anent the competitions have been tempered with charming discretion, it seems evident that from now on Wanganui may consider itself an unapproached centre of culture, and plume itself not only on being fifth city, but also on a satisfactory pre-eminence in the export of judges. PROGRESS OX TIIE RIALTO

Banks are conservative institutions and almost the one sign of ievity an Auckland bank has permitted itself of recent years was revealed when a bank that had erected a fine new building placed a couple of statues on the facade. Whether these statues would have been indicted in the controversy now raging is uncertain; but the fact remains that they did not reign long. They were taken away, and perhaps consigned to oblivion. Since then no local bank has made such frivolous gestures. But now another departure from tradition is threatened. A Queen Street bank has a notice outside its premises to say that Labor Day—spelt in the American way—will be observed a holiday. If this sort of thing continues they will be writing “thru” for

“through” and “check” for “cheque,” and so another ancient stronghold will have fallen.