Heart and Home Chats

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 796, 17 October 1929, Page 6

Heart and Home Chats

By

Anne Rulte

Miss Anne Rutledge will answer letters in this column every Thursday. An accomplished writer , an ardent feminist, a student of human nature atui a wide traveller she is well fitted for the Cash. Those who have problems and lack a confidante to help in their solution may with confi-dence write to Miss Rutledge, whose knowledge tcill be placed at their disposal. A sympathetio woman, she will assist those who stand in need of assistance. Communications for Miss Rutledge should be addressed to THE SUN office.

SMALL—BUT GOOD

Dear Miss Rutledge: The girl I love is little and good, I know, but it is the question of size that troubles me. I am over six feet in height, and she is a dot of five feet. When we are out together people grin in amusement, and our friends have a habit of calling us “the long and short of it.” Do you think that I should let this make any difference to our becoming engaged? LONG LEGS. ANSWER. Most certainly not: You are foolish to lose sleep over the opinion of others, especially people in the street who are rude enough to make observations. Some of (he most capable women in the world have been no taller than vour friend, and as long as her thinking powers are not small, and her temper not short, you have as much chance for happiness with her as any big woman. I may go so far as to say your chances for happiness are greater, because tiny women Usually adore big men; they are willing to look up to them as lord and master. A big man is “He-Who-Will-Be-Obeyed” in nine cases out of ten, but he seldom carries this across the threshold of his home -when his wife is so tiny that a harsh word might blow her away. if you love each other sufficiently to want to marry, don’t waste precious time. ANNE RUTLEDGE. A CORRESPONDENCE COURTSHIP Dear Miss Rutledge: Do you think that it is possible for me to care for a man enough to marry him, although we have not met for four years? We have corresponded regularly all that time, but since meeting him I have become acquainted with someone else whom I care for, and am now corresponding with this man also. I know that both men are sincere by their letters. The former is in a position to marry me, and wishes me to go to him. The latter will not be in a position to marry for some time. I am 24 years of age, and hope that you will be able to advise me. WORRIED. ANSWER In solving similar pi’oblems to your own, I have felt duty bound to point out the distinct advantage the man has, when the girl of his choice goes to join him in some unfamiliar corner of the globe, amid strange surroundings, in a different environment where she is forced to make fresh acquaintances and take up new interests, or feel utterly lonely and suffer agonies from home-sickness Of course much depends on the girl: she may be quiet and retiring or versatile ancl capable of paddling her own canoe anywhere. But, for the man’s part, he is usually already settled in the atmosphere that he has ereated. He has carved out his own little niche, he has his friends, and, moreover, he knows the “ropes.” Frequently, too. when people in love are far apart, it is difficult to face realities on paper. They may find it much easier to unburden themselves, one to the other, with the aid of pen and ink, when awakened ardour gives birth to a series of colourful word-pictures that depict a glowing future impossible to express in the flesh. Many a level-headed person has been swept off his feet by such an experience before today, and there is grave uncertainty attached to marriage that is practically to be decided by “a , drop of ink.” The marital state is an undertaking that should cause every worth-while man and woman to consider ; carefully the pros, and cons, before entering upon Its numerous responsibilities, for too late may come disillusionment and regret. So, “Worried,” although 24 is a sensible age for a girl to entertain thoughts of settling down, take my advice and try to create a means whereby it will be possible for you to come into personal contact with both men before making any decision. This may require considerable effort, but would greatly lessen the chances you take if you make your choiee “by mail-box.” ANNE RUTLEDGE.