From The Watch Tower

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 723, 24 July 1929, Page 8

From The Watch Tower

By

“THE LOOK-OUT MAN.”

THE QUALITY OF MERCY

*‘lt was tlie time when constables warn men to so home, instead of arresting them.”—A policeman, giving evidence at the court yesterda3 r . Sonic people think the policeman's lot is dour — A dull routine of unrelaxed severity. But I'd inform you, there's one hallowed hour TV hen even cops relinquish their severity. When day or night is neither one nor Pother, And Bacchus claims the policeman for his brother. That's when the dusk has spread its sombre pall Over this scene of sorrow and hilarityj When roisterers and constable arc all Knit by the golden filaments of charity. And wise is he, to sober conscience dawning. Who takes the tip , and Jiceds the policeman's learning. Yes. wise the wayward bibber who directs His faltering steps to hearth and domesticity. And yet, what price the husband who collects An admonition charged with electricity f Perchance the laggard from the late carouse Prefers the dungeon to a scolding spouse. T. TOHEROA . FLORA L TRIEUTER It is obvious that the lady in question is devotedly attached to her flower garden. And such an attachment in one so young does a lot to remove the suspicion that the rising generation regards the domestic arts with contempt. What, else but such a preoccupation could have induced her to say of a Waikato dairy farmer in town for a stock sale:—“Oh, yes, he’s come to town to huy some Freesias.” UP IN THE AIR Evidently the original subject of this narrative had been the central figure in one of those football field episodes wherein players form themselves into a human dressing room, from which soon there emerges, “over the top,” a pair of tattered trousers, the never-failing recipe for a laugh from the public. Some may wonder why decency and the City Council permit such a method, which certainly would not be permitted anywhere else—for instance, on Dixieland beach. But a moment’s thought should convince even the most sensitive that there is no other way short of bearing the afflicted sportsman off the field on a stretcher. Anyway, the subject had, as stated, suffered some such misfortune. In the meantime, he commissioned a friend to do his shopping. “What size does he want?” asked the shop assistant. “Oh, lord, I don’t know,” said the baffled Samaritan; “but he takes a 161 collar.” IRON-SHOD How we progress! In ancient days when there were no highway classifications you could drive a locomotive along a road, if you were clever enough. Now there are restrictions which make it dangerous to venture abroad with anything more substantial than a wheelbarrow. The enlightened Matamata County Council has imposed a restriction on motor traffic on tlie Mamaku Hills road, but it is still possible for jocund teamsters to drive heavy iron-shod drays along the highway forbidden to buses. A two-wheel dray with narrow Sin tyres places an axle-weight of 25cwt on each wheel, whereas a motor-vehicle carrying the same load distributes its weight over four wheels, cushioned with rubber. But, of course, the one is a modern means of conveyance; the other belongs to the good old days. Next time we ride over the Mamaku Hills, we shall do so in state in our horse and dray. HUMANE WARFARE It has been suggested that gas promises to do for warfare what chloroform has done for surgery. Apparently scientific and medical opinion is coming round to the belief that poison gases are more humane than shells, because high explosives rend and tear flesh. Then, those with great possessions contend with some gratitude, that gas does not destroy property. It might suffocate or maim a great city’s inhabitants, but buildings would remain intact for the future use of the conquerers. If bombardments were confined exclusively to slum areas, perhaps many people in aristocratic quarters would prefer bombs and shells to poison gas. In any case, there is a great, deal of talk in America these days about the humane advantages of gas in warfare. Statistics are given to prove that poison gas is not so lethal as some people fancy. Only four American soldiers were blinded by gas during the entire war. It is surprising to learn that there were as many as four.