WITH SAM TO THE POLL

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 652, 2 May 1929, Page 8

WITH SAM TO THE POLL

CAM says that he is a strong sup. porter of the secret ballot—-“Secrec-v” having been bis telegraphic address' for years—but he doesn’t mind on this occasion, and for the usual small consideration, disclosing his reactions to the Municipal Elections. An ardent supporter of the Vote-Early-and-Often principle, Sam was at the doorstep of the polling booth at 9 o’clock to record his vote. His subsequent appearances at 10.30, 11.25. 12.15 and 4.36 were not received with enthusiasm by Mr. Notley. On his final appearance at two minutes past six he claims to have taken the count from the returning officer. This, of course, may result in invalidating the election, but Sara says that he doesn’t wish to stress that aspect—not, at all events, until all the trouble has blown over. Sam savs he found no difficulty at all in coping with the ballot papers. He had devised a simple system. By winding the paper once round his waist and twice round his right wrist, and holding two pencils in his teeth, he was through in less than 15 minlutes. A flick of the wrist, each time, was all that was necessary. He is issuing a manual on the subject.

Sam says his first vote was for Mr. Jerrv Lundon. He read all Mr. Lundon’s advertisements, and is of the opinion that the new councillor is a better man than Edgar Wallace. Mr. Lundon, he says, is easily his favourite author. That touch about “The Noblest Roman of Them All” brought eyes to his tears, and “Sole SuperIndependent,” he says, is about the noblest piece of word-building he has come across. He is sorry he can’t express an opinion on “J’Accuse” as he has always had an antipathy toward Esperanto, and on that point has been unable to follow Mr. Lundon.

The ladies, Sam says, received his complete support. He voted for all four of them, and took care to put a row of crosses against §acb name. Sam is of the opinion that there are not enough ladies at the council table, although there are enough old women to swamp it. There is too much parish pump about civic affairs and not enough kitchen stove, he argues. His one regret is that he was unable to persuade his life-long friend, Mrs. Selina Winterbottom, to enter the lists. A cold, stern woman, with a keen eye for finance, she would, Sam thinks, blind them all with science. He is not without hopes of being able to talk her over before 1931.

Sam says he voted for Mr. George Baildon as Mayor. “Good ole George’U do me!” In spite of all this talk of Daniels and Belshazzars he knew in his inner heart that the right man would win and that this stuff about “Mean Mean and Tickle” being written, on a wall was just so much bunk. He intends to write to Mr. Baildon and to ask him to suggest a time and place that a flagon may be quaffed to celebrate a great victory. “I have no doubt George will be there,” he says, as I have been solid for him all along, although my confreres on The Sun have chosen to disagree with me. But after all. what’s a disagreement between pals? As my little friend Miss Irene Homer puts it: ‘Life’s like that,’ and it's no use crying over spilt beer. There’s enough water in it already.”—f Sam adds that he particularly wants that last bit to go into the paper as he has taken a dislike to the landlord of the Crab and Gumboil, who is a low fellow of the baser sort.]