Feminine Interests

Sun (Auckland), Volume III, Issue 621, 25 March 1929, Page 5

Feminine Interests

The Domesticated Husband

“George is simply marvellous in the house.” I've heard that remark many times from the lips of infatuated newlyweds, but rarely from those whose married life lias spread over a number of years. Women are perverse creatures, and while they would decry a man for his selfishness, they would also condemn him if he became the least bit domesticated. There is nothing so pathetic, so annoying, as a domesticated husband. No man with any great intelligence or capacity for making a success of his life could possibly “potter” about doing any odd jobs and enjoying them. Tile domesticated husband is always the same type. That rather breathless, ingratiating little man, overwhelmed by his own respectability and revelling in the honour of “being so good to his wife.” What Can’t He Do? He can cook a dinner, wash the dishes, light the fires, mend the burst pipes, paint the sitting-room, rub his wife's chest with camphorated oil should she have a cold, make the baby’s bottle, and order the meat! In fact, he’s a really model husband.! But what a model! And just how far does he ever climb? Isn’t he always to be found in the came rut, the same sphere, without making the slightest effort to rise above it? Is he ever to be found in art, letters, or music? Does the world ever acclaim him? The mother who sits placidly with her knitting and extols the virtues of her domesticated boys is the first enemy of these husbands. She has condemned them to concentrate on the petty things when she ought to have been showing them the stars. Which suggests another phase. Isn’t any wife, knowing the propensity of her husband toward any menial task, taking a mean advantage when she allows him to indulge it? She must realise that the very fact of his being willing to potter about shows that he is lacking in all sense of manliness or even ambition. Therefore, she should use every ounce of her influence to cultivate in him those missing qualities. Men are easily governed. A woman’s word counts at least 75 per cent, in the average home. Wives of domesticated husbands are usually the worst culprits. They think of the five minutes’ rest they may have to-day, while George is washing the dishes, rather which they might have if they endeavoured to inspire George to concentrate on more important things. For the wife who allows her husband to do a maid’s work will never possess the original! And if a woman cannot run her home without her husband’s help she ought never to have been married. In fairness to these “domesticated” husbands, this must be said: that in this pleasure-loving, modern day, if they didn’t sometimes take the wheel in the home while their wives are dancing their heads off, there would be no homes at all! Also there are wives who “expect” help from their husbands in this way. If the man is sensible enough to put his foot down in the beginning and

6ay, “I’ve my own work to do —tlii is yours, do it!” in true cave-mai style, all will be serene; if not, be wil find that in a few years he will hav< developed into a “Mary” and have los every scrap of his own individuality

Nothing can be done in this life without the effect being far-reaching. The domesticated man loses all touch with men! He does women’s work and absorbs their characteristics. He is no longer welcomed at the club. His whole outlook becomes narrowed, even enfeebled. He is merely the shadow of his wife. His children, in time, contemn him for allowing himself to have been so over-ruled. Life is a mass of contradictions. Every gesture we make is a symbol of our own capabilities, our capacity for thought. And the wife who talks easily about the “goodness” of her huhband in the home is really admitting that she has married a failure whose mind is so lacking in the essential breadth that he can become a menial without realising the indignity of it —for a man. Let’s have less of these domesticated husbands! And less of the lazy wives who encourage them. What, when there is such a world about us, so full of wonder and delight and fun, to fix the height of enjoyment at sitting in an over-heated, over-upliolstered conservatory, at eating and drinking more than enough (for that’s what it comes to), at -wearing clothes designed to express a claim to superiority over the common

.herd! What a folly! What a waste! At a moment in our national life, ; too, when we should all be struggling ; against the forces of decay, to make luxury, softness, self-indulgence our aim is pitiful. As for the desire to 3 j live That sort of life when millions 1 : among us are without what we con--1 sider bare necessaries of existence, ? I that deserves a harsher epithet. A t i good time, indeed! A selfish, mean . I time, say I.

When filling in cracks or nail holes in floors before polishing, mix into the putty a little dry colour to match the work, and the patching will be indiscernible. Rub lightly over with sandpaper to remove any unevenness before the final coat is applied.

THE INDEPENDENT CHILD Within limits, children should be encouraged to do what they want to do in their own way. The mother or nurse who is constantly coming to the rescue and helping the child is really hindering his development, for the child, even more than tile grown-up, learns by doing things. His efforts may seem mistaken, or even mischievous, but they have their significance and their value in the little one’s education. Take, for intsanee, the tiresome trick (as it appears to us) of throwing things out of the pram! Toys, shoes, socks, parcels, cushions —everything the small hands can seize goes down into the dust, and no amount of scolding seems to have any effect. Naturally enough the child, although he doesn't know it, is experimenting in measuring distance, weight and sound. Instead of being punished for naughtiness he should be provided with some substitute form of activity. If s’ou see a child trying to climb up to a chair or sofa, it may be mistaken kindness to lift hm up and put him in the place he seems to want to be in. If you do so, as likely as not he will immediately scramble down again and renew the attempt in his own way. What he is interested in is not being there, but getting there, as is proved when he does at last reach that dizzy height, only to slide down and begin the climb again. Place a cushion to assist him in his efforts, if you like, but don't interfere in his really useful activities. He doesn’t know it, but he is learning to use his limbs, and the unwearying repetition of the process of climbing up and getting down is his triumphant celebration of achievement. There are limits, of course, and it is very necessary to hinder and, little by little, to suppress those activities which are harmful to himself or to others. But, whenever it is possible, the wise mother will encourage her child to do things for himself. By so doing she will give the best help in developing his physical and mental powers, and she will, at the same time, benefit him morally by training him to be enterprising and self-reliant. J.O. WHEN MEDICINE IS UNPALATABLE If your palate is so sensitive that you have difficulty in taking unpleasant medicinp, you will find it an advantage to destroy the taste in the first instance, rather than attempt to disguise it afterwards. A small piece of alum, a peppermint lozenge, or a tiny piece of orange or lemon rind, held in the mouth for a minute or two just before taking the medicine will enable you to swallow it without effort. A sprig of parsley or mist, or a tiny piece of raw onion, will also aid the sensitive palate if chewed a few minutes before taking the draught. Many women are deterred from taking codliver oil because of the feeling of nausea which follows. To prepare the palate so that the oil will scarcely be tasted, pour the dose into a cup and place it in boiling water for a minute or two, meanwhile sipping half a cupful of hot water. Now drink the partly-thinned oil, and foliaw up with another drink of hot. water. People often refuse to take o.bjve oil because the taste lh|;ers so long in the mouth. To prevent this, add a drop of essence of lemon to the oil just before drinking. The flavouring thoroughly disguises the taste of the oil, no matter how sensitive the palate. Castor oil may be rendered more palatable by first thinning the dose in hot water, and then grating into it a little nutmeg, or adding a pinch or two of all-spice.