Heart and Home Chats

Sun (Auckland), Volume II, Issue 494, 25 October 1928, Page 5

Heart and Home Chats

By

Anne Rutledge

To-day ue introduce Miss Anne Rutledge, to SUN readers. Miss Rutledge will answer letters in this column every Thursday. An accomplished writer, an ardent feminist, a student of human nature and a wide traveller, she is tce.ll fitted for the. task. Those w ho have problems and lack a confidante to help in their solution may, with confidence, write to Miss Rutledge , whose knowledge will be placed at their aisposal. A sympathetic woman, she will assist those who stand in need of assistance. Communications for Miss Rutledge should be addressed to THE SUN office. , UNEXPECTED VISITORS Dear Miss Rutledge,— The other evening my husband brought two guests home unexpectedly to dinner. I had been busy during the day. intending to make do with the remains of a cold joint and some lettuce for the evening meal, and was obliged to serve this to my husbands friends, as there was no other food in the house. Preparing the table, I remembered that the fowls had clucked a good deal that morning in the yard, but I had been too busy to collect the eggs. However, I felt too tired to bother very much then. When we were all ready to eat, I sensed my husband’s displeasure at the simple fare, and this entirely spoiled my evening. After the guests had departed, my husband was anything but complimentary as to the way I run my household. Don’t you think that he showed a lack of consideration in thrusting his friends upon me at the 11th hour, expecting a good meal and all to run on oiled wheels? Could I have done anything else under the circumstances? G.C.H. ANSWER. When you remembered there were eggs in the fowlyard. you should have "gone for your life” and collected them. All good housewives know that eggs make delicious entree dishes and can be prepared, in a number of appetising ways, in the twinkling of an eye. If you desire to avoid some of the snags and pitfalls of married life, then remember that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. I quite agree that a * husband should realise what washing day means; but how many do? Yet, knowing that your husband prefers to bring his pals home rather than entertain them downtown should comfort you. And if you don’t want his good habits to change, I would suggestion "Keep Your Home Attractive” as a helpful slogan. At the same time, have a pleasant chat with your husband about his shortcomings. Just point out that you are entitled to a little notice when he is bringing his friends home. lam sure that he will tell you he was preoccupied with business matters when he invited them. Business worries often cause men to be thoughtless about domestic affairs. Last of all, J suggest that it would be well to keep in your cupboard some tinned meats and vegetables. These can be quickly prepared in an emergency. ANNE RUTLEDGE. THE CUT DIRECT? Dear Miss Rutledge,— I have a girl friend whose acquaintance I value very highly. Although we only meet occasionally, I have reason to believe that she enjoys my little attentions. However, much to my astonishment, my friend cut me in the street the other day, and went on her way as though she had not seen me. I cannot think of any act of mine that would cause her to behave in this way and, naturally, I feel very distressed. My pride forbids me taking the first step, yet something must be done, as I do not want to lose her friendship. What can Ido about it? MYSTIFIED. ANSWER. There is a misunderstanding somewhere. You must try to clear it up. Could any mutual friends wish to make mischief between you, and .in so doing have blackened you in her eyes?

Saorifiop your pride and call to see her. mi will know- immediately if she is indifferent towards you and then it would be best for you, tactfully, to draw her into an explanation. Should she behave as usual, and show genuine pleasure at seeing you. it might be better not to mensubject. You may have made a mistake, as many people walk along too preoccupied with their thoughts to notice every # passer-by. ANNE RUTLEDGE. A ROUND OF CALLS Dear Miss Rutledge,— I am a young wife beginning my round of first calls. Should I leave one or two of my husband’s cards with my own? Also, what is the correct size for a woman’s visiting card? Is there any special design or colour? PUZZLED. ANSWER. It is correct to leave two of your husband’s cards with one of your own. Brides sometimes use the joint card when returning calls made upon them after the return from the honeymoon. The approximate size for a woman’s visiting card should be two and seveneighths inches in length, and two and oneeighth inches in width. The colour should be white or cream ; severely plain, without ornamentation. ANNE RUTLEDGE. TOO MUCH BRIDGE Dear Miss Rutledge,— I am very fond of playing bridge. Unfortunately, however, it seems to be getting such a hold upon me that frequently I cannot get home in the afternoon in time to welcome my husband from business. I sometimes make up my mind to cut out the game, but if the telephone rings and I am invited to play, I have not the will to refuse. Should I stop playing altogether? M.M. ANSWER. Dear M.M., — Perhaps you could pay me a visit? I have a neighbour who has seven children, the eldest of which is 11 years old. This woman is overjoyed when her husband is able to secure three full days’ work a w r eek. She sings sometimes, and when hanging clothes on the line, I have seen her pause to gather a few flowers in the garden to brighten her poorly furnished rooms. T am sure you would profit greatly from spending an hour in her company. Then we might go on to the hospital to cheer up the many patients who are weighed down by anxiety and lack of means. An afternoon thus spent will help yoifc to solve your problem, and if you do continue to play bridge, I am sure it will only be. occasionally, as a form of mental gymnastics. ANNE RUTLEDGE. A WIDOW IS PERPLEXED Dear Miss Rutledge,— I had the most devoted of husbands for 14 years, and am now a widow, and have been for quite a few years, only because I’ve been too frightened to attempt a second marriage. Do you think it possible to he happily married a second time? (I was used to so much attention.) Is it possible to get anything like the same sort of devotion a second time, one wonders? I shall be glad of any advice you can give. BEWILDERED. ANSWER. In cherishing the memory, we are apt to create or see a new being, faultless and perfect. The success of a second marriage largels' rests with you, for if the opportunity presents itself, you should know by careful observation whether the partnership would be happy and agreeable or. otherwise. Again, vou state that you were used to attention and devotion. I think that vou must tune your thoughts to a higher plane to expect true happiness. Having met a man whose association and friendship you consider harmonious, it is up to you to think rather of the inspiration and service you can be to him. Real co-operation will bring it.s own reward. In connection with your inquiry, the following well-known lines appeal to me: ’Tis not in mortals to command success, but we’ll do more, deserve it.” AXXE RUTLEDGE.