Page 25 Advertisements Column 2

Sun (Auckland), Volume II, Issue 400, 14 July 1928, Page 25

DOMINION "SEA Brand BOOTS (1) 100%' protection slush and mud. against M vt e o m (2) The appearance of the boot denotes strength and its composition ensures it. (3) For every farm use, this boot will be found superior to all others. (4) Notice the rolled over white soles with the non-slip tread and the thick, black uppers. This mark protects the boot - the boot protects f yO\3' Obtainable zvith or without cleats at all good Boot and Shoe Dealers.

THEY ALL FALL Flattery is the food of fools — They swallow every bit; But where’s the man with sou! Take in Some Pleats.—Lady: “I like the dress, but it’s too small for me—could it be altered?” Famous Dress Designer: ‘‘lmpossible! But if madam will go to our beauty parlour, she can be altered to Fit the dress!” HER BRAND ‘You shall be O wondrous she ill not fall for Get a Shoe-Horn.—Barnum : “Tot bad about that lion tamer, isn’t it?” Bailey: “How’s that?” Barnum:. “He’s so swelled up over his press notices that he can’t get his head in the lion’s mouth.” Hollywood Kick.—A novelist was chatting with his publisher. “Bv the way, where did you get the plot of your second novel?” asked the letter. “From the film version of the first.' was the reply. V" . '* V I’ll mark you for my < said; And placed upon his cheek of ta An imprint of two lips in red. Refreshing a Grouch. —Pincus hadn't seen Ginsberg for five years, but deliberately passed him on the street, as usual. And rushed into his office and yelled to his stenographer: “Mollic. look in the files under G.* and see why I’m core at Ginsberg.” Love with a Wallop. —Mother: “Win Bobby, I'm ashamed of you— to b* Fighting with your little cousin, thought you loved Stephen.** Bobby: “Why. of course, I love him ’cause he’s my cousin, but I don’t lik* him one bit.” “Women are like collars. It is not until you get them round your neck that you can tell how big they are.” —“Nagel's Lustige Welt,*’ Berlin Earnest Worker.—“ Does your nei typist use the touch system?” • Well, she certainly didn’t buy tha fur coat out of her wages.” “I lost a bottle of brandy. Has it been brought in?” “No. But the man who found it has ” —“Wahre Jakob.” Berlin. Time to Hoof.—He: “Do you indulge reatly in terpsichorean art?” She: “Oh, why bother about such lings. Let’s dance!” 4 . nr Growing Up and Up.—Sweet Sixteen: “Mother, I’m tired of looking such a kid—couldn’t I have shorter frocks now?” Shine ’em Up, Boss!—City Slicker: “What does your son do?” Farmer: “He’s a bootblack in the “What is a hypocrite? “A boy who comes smiling to school.' —“Moustique.” Charleroi. City Slicker: "Oh. 1 see. you make] Free Ride. —Pedestrian: “What's the j shortest way to the emergency hosBeating ’Em To it.—“ Docs your ; mother let you read this modern sex stuff?” “Not if she gets her hands on it j first.” Less Anatomical. Granddaughter (being lectured): “I seem to have heard that the girls of your period ‘set their caps’ at men.” Disapproving Grandmother: “But not rheir knee-caps.” How to Be Your Own Ancestor.— A man in a letter to the Harrodsburj “Herald” claims he is his c wn grand father. His letter says: “1 married ; widow with a grown daughter. M; father, a widower, married my step- j daughter, thus becoming my son-in- ; law and his wife, formerly my step- j daughter, became my stepmother also j My wife also became my grandmother | grandmother is called granddad, I mils’ l>e my own grandfather.” (77^ m 7% “Just stand He Might Jig. —Doctor: “You want to cheer yourself up as much as possible —sing at your work." Patient: “It can’t be done; I’m a glass blower.” Two-handed Courting. —“ Girls were harder to kiss in your days, weren't they, grandpa?” “Well, me bee; but it wasn’t so blame dangerous. The ol’ parlor sofa wasn't apt to smash into a tree Jest about the time ye got ail puckered up.” Set ’Em Up.—A Los Angeles patroli man had brought in a negro woman | somewhat the worse for wear, and the i desk sergeant, with his very best scowl, roared: “Liza, you’ve been brought in for intoxication! ” “Dat’s fine!” beamed Liza. “Boy, you can start right now’!” Old Lady: ‘‘Nothing ii the same price as in Mat Shopkeeper: “Pardon, stamps!” —“Bu Living Skeleton's y<*ur kitchen small?’ “Is it? Why, it’s to use condensed mi Ik.’ Or Was It Queen Anne?—On t: ' turning of March 9. 1862. Hampm Loads was the scene of a battle whic did more to revolutionise naval wa» fi re than any encounter since Lor Nelson’s doughty fleet of light, swi' vessels attacked, defeated and Touted the mighty Spanish Armada. the coast of Ireland, in the reign • o"eer Hliznbeth The Family Reputation.—"ls it possible,” gasped the indignant paren: “that you would dishonour my narnt on the boards of a theatre?” “But. father.” returned the stage struck youth. “J would take an assumed Nest.— * V* ' Indeed! And ipp< DU re t« "Are you not too big now to go playng with the boys?” “Oh, no. The bigger I get the more ’ll like it.” —"!>«-r Gemutliche Sachse.” Leipzig.