TOPICAL TITBITS

Sun (Auckland), Volume I, Issue 241, 31 December 1927, Page 21

TOPICAL TITBITS

The man who saves money nowadays isn’t a miser; he’s a wizard.— “Columbus Dispatch.” Laugh and the world laughs with you; weep and you streak your rouge. —“Los Angeles Times.” * * * Marvellous as the radio is, the pronunciation of some of the announcers is even more so.—“ American Lumberman.” * * * Love at first sight is possible;' buc it is always well to wipe off your spectacles and take a second look. — “Everett Herald.” * * * The modern girl would make a wonderful cook if she could find a kitchen that was run by a steering wheel. — “Denton (Texas) Record-Chronicle.” * * * A party of forty American visitors to England brought their own cars with them. The trouble is that they’ll probably use our pedestrians.—“ London Opinion.” Ducking the Cussing.—Jones: ‘‘Why have you that courtesy sign on the rear of your auto?” Green: “So people can see it when I cut in past them.” * * * Respite.—Mrs. Thomas: “The landlord says if the rent isn’t paid by Saturday—out we go.” Thomas: “Fine! That gives us nothing to worry about for five days.” Compound Interest.—“So you met Alice to-day.” “Yes, I hadn’t seen her for ten years.” “Has she kept her girlish figure?” “Kept it? She’s doubled it.” Placing the Static.—Mrs. Witsend (from stairway): “Wilbur, for mercy’s sake, turn off that radio! That woman has the awful]est voice I ever heard!” Wilbur: “Ha! Ha! This isn’t the radio, Ma. This is Mrs. Highpitcli come to call!” Putting the Treat in Treatment.— Doctor: “Your temperature seems to have taken a drop.” Patient: “Can’t you fix it so 1 can do the same, doctor?”