STUDENTS’ RAG

Sun (Auckland), Volume 1, Issue 71, 15 June 1927, Page 11

STUDENTS’ RAG

CITIZENS “HONOURED” HUNDREDS TURNED AWAY REVELRY AT TOWN HALL Doh Ray Me Cottenlipp (architect)—9odeg. or one right angle. Richard Anslem Singer-Nisi (to be made absolute in three months with costs on the lower scale as from distance ). Barret Spit, M.A. C Mayor of Auckland, triple third in elections'). * Thomas Bloodworxh, A.S.S. (also started). Commissioner Mussolini Vaseliny Mcllveney , N.P. (Nosey Parker, 3r degree).

Alfred Hall Skelton , S.A.S.A. (Stand and Stand again). JJHESE were the degrees conferred on some of Auckland's well-known Cl ss. ens last <iVe *iing at the Town Hall. Then there were the birthday honours—the consolation ones.

They were tossed out regardless of expense. Gordon Coates was invested w r ith the B.N.K. (Big Noise of Kaipara), Ellen Melville with the P.M.P. (Practice Makes Perfect), Christopher James Parr with the R.S.V.P. (Refreshments Served Very Plentifully), an <* George Bail don was made a D.C.L. (Director of Civic Legislation). Auckland evidently wants its students’ procession back again. If numbers are any criterion, it said 80 to tbe tune of a packed Town Hall and hundreds turned away long before the performance began last evening. And the Rev. Jasper Calder said that he would give a guarantee of good behaviour on the part of the university students if the council relaxed its resolution abolishing the procession.

The students of the Auckland University held their unofficial graduation ceremony last evening, in the name of charity. Over £IOO was added to Mr. Calder’s mission fund. Community singing, led by a conductor who looked like a cross between a bargain sale and a Russian anarchist, opened the proceedings. The serious part of the ceremony consisted of public congratulations by Mr. ‘D. H. Steen, president of the Students’ Association, of the students who had taken their degrees during the year. Bouquets and boxes of chocolates were showered on tljie women—the men were content with handshakes and occasionally a passionate embrace from lusty young “females” with very grass-grown legs and an abundance of garter. Then the musical comedy part of the ceremony began. Everything and everybody was burlesqued, from prominent citizens to the professorial staff of the university. Students made the rafters of the Town Hall (if there are any rafters) ring with their topical songs, one of which ran* I wonder if you’ve v seen me. My name is Mcllveney. If policemen talk obscenely, You know they always mean me.

A dashing bevy of “girls” from the Consolidated Stammer School, arrayed in gym. costumes and displaying more nether limb than most young things are wont to expose, performed some rather rheumaticky eurythmics. The girls (?) gave way to the “Professorial Board,” a ragged-looking lot who, with the greatest gravity and discord, sang “Down Among the Bluebells.” With much blaring of trumpets, “Mr. R. O’Shea” and “The Hon. George Fowlds” proceeded to confer degrees on the students.

In a burst of liberality the “professors” decided on a little prizegiving ceremony. Albert Edward Forde was given a season ticket for a community bus for the three-mile walk, having missed his tram, and Lord William Rufus Goodfellow one cheese for the high dive into the butter pool.

Last, but not least, the “winner” of the “Miss New Zealand Screen Contest” went through her film test with her trainer. Her calisthenics and cartwheels, prompted the board to give her the following prizes: Firm of Fowlds: Two meta’ armbands. Champtaloup and Ecjmiston: “How to Hunt and Hold a Husband.” Hannah and Sons: A greenhide sole. Hospital Board: One free operation. Crothall Way: One dry clean. Electrolux Co.: One vacuum clean. Licensed Victuallers’ Association: One spot (beauty). The Censors: A fair run. If Auckland has lost its students’ procession it has gained an excellent

entertainment, which will probably be repeated next year. The professors of the university must have enjoyed the burlesques—but rumour has it that none of them attended the performance.