“I HATE”

Sun (Auckland), Volume 1, Issue 64, 7 June 1927, Page 10

“I HATE”

THE KLAXON CHORUS I hate the roaring kind of horn, The backbone-boring kind of horn. Which blares a short Impulsive snort That lifts your skin and scalp: It seems to fit the roaring cars. The neat and fleet hill-soaring cars. Which hog the road; The large abode Of power to climb an alp. I much dislike when on a run To hear a crackling Lewis gun Lose ten rounds quick, And sharp and slick. Just under my right ear; I rush at once to swerve and skip. My figners, nerves that curve and trip Then, with a jar, Find it’s a car’s Freak horn that’s caused my fear. I hear the angel’s quiring hail Disguised within the siren’s wail, The warning shriek That mounts a peak Of force-defying sound; I know that several tons of steel And thriving, driving sons of steel, Too big to bump, Are on the jump, And haste to give it ground. 1 can’t admire that tootin’ tone. Insistent, high-falutin, tone, Which scorns the mob, The sort of snob. Who wants the highway clear; A highly pitched, yet throaty sound, A hoity-toity, gloaty sound, Which irritates And causes hate Whenever it draws near. I never mind that yapping bark That terrier-like and snapping bark Which warns “Beware,” But in despair, Tails off into a growl; I know its something small and short. Whose lower power has fallen short Of hopes to pass— Not in my class. It couldn’t catch a fowl. I must confess I disapprove Of horns on all that quickly move; Which have the speed I sometimes need, And pass me as they wish: They have a boastful trumpet voice, A “Race, or yield and lump it” voice: With throttle pressed I do my best Their toots float back—“ Poor fish.” Remember that oil is cheaper than bearings. Keep a sharp look-out for oil leaks. A clean garage floor lias obvious advantages in this connection. Keep joints and bolts tight. With a splash system of lubrication the tray beneath the big ends may possibly be slightly lowered with advantage, but it is best to experiment with one vehicle at first: in new engines the trays will almost certainly stand lowering when the bearings are run in. If plugs keep oiling up, faulty piston rings may be suspected. If the engine gets oily, examine the breather.