FROM THE WATCH TOWER

Sun (Auckland), Volume 1, Issue 62, 4 June 1927, Page 10

FROM THE WATCH TOWER

By the LOOK-OUT MAN. NEVER SATISFIED! Some men are never satisfied. In Wellington, the other day, a petitioner in divorce complained that his wife treated him as if she were a servant. Since so many women complain that their husbands treat them as servants —indeed many business girls refuse to marry because they say it simply means giving up work to enter domestic service—he should have been quite pleased at his wife’s humble attitude. The sting of it, though, lay in the fact that she gave him a week’s notice to leave—and she did leave. It’s so hard to get good servants, too. IS IT A MYSTERY.’ A Sydney correspondent brings to light the latest Australian mystery. A group of aborigines, with tawny hair, but conforming in other respects to the Australoid stock, were described by Professor Griffith Taylor. Perplexity and astonishment at the phenomena were registered by the learned professor, and other learned professors are busy propounding various highly scientific theories. The worst of science is that it often overlooks very simple, unscientific causes. In Fiji, for instance, there are lots of tawny-headed black men. No one in Fiji indulges in scientific speculation about it, for it is commonly known that some of the natives lime their hair to obtain the coveted colour. There’s a lot of lime in Australia. Reminds one of the great discovery made by a scientific person in “Pickwick Papers.” It was a stone, strangely engraven. Scientific England was to be thrilled by this relic of the Roman or an even earlier age. There was profound discussion by profoundly learned people. Then some person of very rude learning cleaned the stone up, and deciphered the lettering: “X Bill Stumps, his mark.” ONEHUNGA’B SPIRITUAL RENAISSANCE Onehunga lias not only livened up materially. Following the celebration of its Diamond Jubilee, staged in a fashion calculated to show the critic that it had thoroughly awakened as the result of his “unkind jibe,” it is experiencing something in the nature of. a religious revival. There are (really!) 2,500 houses in Onehunga, and these are being canvassed by representatives of the several sfcts, who consider the time has arrived for men and women to declare their Church—and come to it. Some people, of course, do not care to be interrogated as to their religion, but though one minister encountered Theosophists, Christian Scientists, Seventh Day Adventists, Brethren of the Lord and other faiths, he declared that he did not meet a single professed agnostic or atheist. So there is more religion in the masses than they are generally given credit for —in Onehunga, at all events. The good shepherds expect large increases in their flocks as the result of this canvass. Here is a chance for the languishing building trade, for most of Onehunga’s churches are now crowded to capacity. THE GAB-WORK’S BIBLE ’Twould have been a pity to have tailed-off the above goodly tale with a jest, so a special paragraph must be devoted to the humorous aspect. At one house visited by the ministers there was a whole church, parson and congregation. It had its own particular creed, its own way of worship and conducted its own services, with dad as the parson. At another house, a man, who was slightly deaf, when asked what church he belonged to, replied, “The Gasworks.” Presumably “Hansard” was his Bible. FROM BING KEE Bing Kee writes the Look-out Man: “SUN, you say Tea Time tale jazz noise no made pilano Chinese finger allee same you leporter mean Eulopean lady my wife. No savvy Eulopean—allee same Chinee she mallied Chinee. Me mally white girl allee same. Blitish law say Blitish girl Mally foreign man. She no more Blitish, she belong countlee man. She mally. My wife no more likee Eulopean—she likee Chinee me too much. Me mally Blitish girl, she no more Blitish. she Chinee. She Chinee wife now. Chinee fingers now, Chinee toes now. All Chinee now, so play Chinee jazz now all China finger. Lil’ boy baby all Chinee too. —Bing Kee.” ADAPTABLE CHINESE L li.l A Southern magistrate, when fining a Chinaman for having worked on Anzac Day, told him that when in Rome he should do as the Romans. The advice seems hardly necessary for most Chinamen, who adapt them selves readily to their surroundings. A Chinese market gardener at Hillsborough has just installed a wireless set. One can imagine him sitting in his. shack after the labour of the day, enjoying bed-time stories. Every one has heard of the Chinaman going to Otago who changed his name from Chin Lull to McPherson. Another Chinaman settling in Dunedin was advised to become a Presbyterian. Later, when asked if he were a Christian, he replied: “Me no Clistian; me Plesbytelian."