LOCAL AND GENERAL.

Stratford Evening Post, Volume XXXVII, Issue 95, 22 December 1913, Page 4

LOCAL AND GENERAL.

»— The "Stratford Kveuing Post" will not l)t> published on Christmas Day. December 2oth, nor on Boxing Day. December 2Gth. .Music (of a kind) is usually very nine}] "in the air" per medium o 1 the penny trumpet on Xmas Kvc, 'nit it will afford pleasure to learn that on that evening tlie public are to he asked to "listen to the hand." Particulars of Die Wad's intention io rentier a selection of Xmas carols may l>e seen in our advertising ooluiuus.

Tho Courthouse will be closed from December 2-lth to January 3rd, both ( days inclusive. "Word lias been received in Stratford that on Christmas Eve all businesses may remain open till 11 p.m. An amusing court scene skit, deai . ing with local prominent busir.es-vs. appears in this issue on pages - and S, i An inebriate who bad been in the cells since noon on .Saturday was this morning convicted and discharged at the Court this morning. Mr S. H. Hunter, J.P., was on the bench.

A Highland fling given at the Xgaere school concert on Friday night was greatly appreciated, excellent, pipe music being supplied by Mr Duncan Ferguson. Master Orr has just recently learnt to dance, being a pupil of Mr J. Wade, iunr.

When children are absent from school the State wants to ■know the reason why, and sends a form to parents for filling in. During the Auckland strike a girl was absent from school, and the usual form Mas sent out to the mother. The reason stated in reply was: "I kept away from school and sent her out to call 'scab' at the cockies."

The Hamilton butchers have inaugurated a strict cash system. Ali orders for meat have to be given thy <k:y

previous to that for which it is required, and it has to be paid for on delivery, otherwise it is taken hack to the shop. No exceptions are made in this connection. It is a case of "No

money, no meat." Customers wno purchase at the shops are allowed a discount of o per cent.

The illuminated address presented to Mr W. Morant Bayly on Saturday is a handsome piece of work, and reects great credit on the artist, Mr Corlett. The work throughout ii highly artistic, and inset are pictures of Mount Egmont, the National Bank premises and Mr Bayly's residence. The a,ddress i;> now on view in the New Zealand Clothing Co.'s window in Broadway.

The change of proprietorship at the Empire Hotel is at present in progress, Mr Fitzgerald being engaged at present in shifting his effects to his now'residence in Page Street:'At closing time on Saturday night a large crowd of friends and supporters had gathered' in the Empire, and the future health and ■ prosperity , of. Mr and Mrs Fitzgerald! and family was heartily drunk to the accompaniment of cheers. The ; new' licensee; Mr < R>. H. .Campbell hopej;, to be in-full possession this even-

I ; There;,ai;e rules. |,and: regulation.", I governing the whole of human activities, and, consequently, though they have not been codified and printed, for general information, there arc complete and sufficient rules and regulations which persons who habi tually, periodically or spasmodically , look, upon , the wine ~,when 'it* is ; ,re ; d. should, follow , during . tliat period. preceding the rime ' .wlmu the conclusion dawns upon the habitual., periodic, or. spasmodic imbiben that, "it biteth like, a serpent." Probably it will be found that Rule I in tin's code reads: ."When you feel absolutely sure that the King is actually and. veritably yo.ur cousin ami you are sitting down at the time, keep on sitting down; undesirable results yf divers descriptions may ensue if the patient rises to his feet and walks about." A man who was travel lino; by Saturday night's mail train—probably he was a

spasmodic practitioner—disregarded Rule 1 with results at least uncomfortable to himself. He was a tall man, woaring a seafarer's jacket, probably the jacket worn by a Shaw Savill quartermaster or bosun. He was very nearly "the King's cousin," and when the train stopped at Stratford he injudiciously stepped out on the platform and after a short promenade stopped in the vicinity of the northern tanks and made an endeavour to beat himself at pitch-and-toss, using a sovereign for spinning. A spell in the refrigerating chamber on Friday night and a par ade on the quarterdeck on Saturday morning completed his little tragedy.