LOCAL AND GENERAL.

Stratford Evening Post, Volume XXXIV, Issue 85, 5 December 1912, Page 4

LOCAL AND GENERAL.

Auckland lias subscribed £3OO towards the Godley Cadet' Prize Fund, Wellington £BO, Napier £29, Feilding £l9, Pahiatua £lO. and Wanganui £5. Thus an expert quoted bv the ‘Evening News’:—“Onions will certainly cure a cold boiled in milk.” The only difficulty seems to lie in boiling the cold, adds an exchange. Was the New Plymouth Town Clerk having a little joke, or was he really under a misapprehension when he wrote to the Stratford Borough Council offering I .a water-cart for sale, and stating that he understood Stratford was requiring one? A great Labour confcrepcp tajke; place at Vancouver in January next. All Labour parties in the various parts of the Empire will send delegates, and the conference will consider matters of Imperial import, with a view to taking united action on questions affecting the Constitution, the Empire, and the Labour movement. Of all the birds he had studied, said Mr. W. Farren, in a lecture at the exhibition of the Royal Photographic Society, London, none showed conjugal affection in quite the same way as the brown-backed herons of Andalusia, in Spain. Whenever the “husband” relieved his “wife” at the nest, lie “invariably laid his neck across hers in a momentary embrace.” Some of the more prominent Radicals have lately been talking about stopping the pension of Lord Roberts because of his recent trenchant criticism on Britain’s unpreparedness for war. When the famous soldier heard of the proposal he is reported to have said: “I was proud to win the pension in the service of my country, and 1 shall be proud to lose it in her service.” A desperate affray has taken place in one of the smaller New York hotels. A man and a woman, who were supposed to be implicated in some big diamond robberies, took refuge in a room there, and when three detectives and two civilians went to arrest them they opened lire on the intruders with revolvers. The whole live went down before the rapid lire of the automate guns, and it is thought that four of them are fatally injured. Tne two assailants afterwards committed suicide.

To show the danger of neglecting fox-glove, says a correspondent of the ‘Dominion,’ a settler in Maori Bay, ia Pelorus Sound, mentioned that though, after its first seeding, he had never again allowed the foxglove to flower, it took fourteen years before he was ultimately rifl of the pest. Ibis is surely a lesson to any farmer who docs not appreciate the menace of this weed. It is stated that a man who was desirous of purchasing a farm in the Sounds, on going over the property with the owner, saw some weeds with which he was not acquainted. On asking what they were, he was told they were “New Zealand lettuce,” and that lambs were very fond of it. On this recommendation he actually purchased the farm. The “lettuce” turned out to be fox-glove, and now it is beyond the farmer’s power to cops with it—it is such a prolific seeder.” A well-known physician was examining a class of nurses. He described the condition of a patient, and asked one nurse how much morphine, in her opinion, should be administered to the sufferer. “Eight grains,” -promptly replied the nurse. The doctor made no comment, and the girl passed on. When her turn came again she appeared greatly confused, and said to the examiner: “.Doctor, I wish to correct the answer I made last time. 1 meant to say one-eighth of a grain should be given to the patient.” “Too late,” remarked the physician, without looking up from his question paper —“The man’s dead.” “Married eleven times, and always for love.” This record is claimed for Lester Lawrence, the well-known American actor, whose latest matrimonial alliance, after eight years of single blessedness, is recorded. Mr. Lawrence has a national reputation as an impetuous wooer, and wedded No. 11, a Chicago girl, after two weeks’ ardent courstship. He gaily admitted that some of his wives are now mere memories, and. while he can recall the Christian names of most, he. has completely forgotten the sixth. All his marriages have been regular, according to the laws of the I'nited Shales. Some divorced him, and ho divorced others.

An Australian shearer, who recently struck a Lincoln Romney shed'ill the Wairarapa, remarked: “Gee! If this is the size of the sheep, I’d like to see the cattle!” A recommendation is to be made to the General Committee of the Stratford A. and P. Association by the executive that a gymkana should be held on the Show Grounds on Easter Monday. airs. Grcson, who is head of her house, remarked one morningJo her husband: “In five today we shall celebrate our sKiafr wedding.” “Better wait five years longer,” said her husband in quiet'desperation, “and then we can celebrate the Thirty Years’ War.” The management of Madam Kirkby Lunn has selected from the Dresden Piano Company’s replete stock, a very fine small grand piano by the famous makers John Broad wood and Sons. This .splendid instrument is to bo used throughout the great singer’s country tour. The Government Statistician gives the population cf New Plymouth at 7500, which is only exceeded by Invercargill, Tiinaru, Palmerston, Wanganui, Napier, Gisborne, and Nelson among the boroughs of New Zealand, in that order. Before very long Nelson is likely to be overtaken by New Plymouth, states the ‘Herald.’ The American Florist states that an extremely handsome casket cover was made for the first Mrs. “Jack” Johnson’s funeral. The cover was 6|ft. by 4*ft., and made entirely of Lily of the Valley. All the other pieces ordered by the “champion” were equally elaborate, and amounted in the aggregate to well over £IOO. At a meeting of the A. and P. Executive held on Tuesday evening it was decided to complete the sheep pens, according to the plan adopted. The W.C.T.L.- (Stratford branch), jwrote thanking the Association for the rest tent at the Show, and the privilege of , selling afternon tea. The secretary was authorised to pay out all prize money. Hearty votes of thanks were passed to the judges, to tnose who donated gifts for the gift auction, and to all tnose generally who assisted to make i the Show a success.

Nearly all the Eltham Cd-operativo Dairy Company’s branch establishments are in full swing, cheese-making (states the ‘Argus’). The Hunter Road factory is awaiting the arrival of some machinery, which should be to hand in a few days. The first shipment of cheese, about 400 crates, will leave Wellington by the Rotorua on the 12th hist, The first grade-note to hand slip tvs the cheese graded at 89 points, winch, for a first shipment, is considered highly satisfactory. The money subscribed to “Tattersail’s” sweeps on the Melbourne Cup this year totalled £175,000, Metropolitan £75,000, and Canfield Cup £50,000 The Tasmanian Government reaps in stamp duties od in every £l, in addition to 5 per cent, dividend tax on prizes. This year the Tasmanian Government lias derived £58,750, and “Tattersall’s” nearly £75,000 in commission, the total amount contributed by the public being £775,000.

The other day a well-known counsel, examining the plaintiff in a breach of promise case, enquired of her : “Was defendant’s air when he promised to marry you perfectly serious or one of levity and jocularity?” The complainant replied-; “If you please, sir, it was all ruflied with him running his'hands through it.” “You misapprehend my moaning,” said the counsel. “Was the promise made in utter sincerity?” “No, sir, it was made in the washhouse,” replied; the ; plaintiff j . amid roars of laughter, 1 The half-yearly meeting of the Eltham Druid's was held last evening, when Bro. S. King, P.D.P., installed the officers for the coining half year. Bro. Kenny (Ngaere) was elected to the position of Arch. Druid, and Bro. Ford Vice Arch. A first-rate supper was "provided, during the course of which Bro. Whiteford was presented with a handsome Past Secretary’s collar, he having creditably idled the position of secretary for the required term. A number of visitors were present from Hawera, and five officers represented the Stratford Lodge, all of whom speak highly of the hospitality extended them by the Eltham brethren. j A good story is going the rounds of Hamilton. It is to the effect that a young couple having agreed to start life in double harness, the swain waited upon a local confectioner mid arranged with him to provide a recherche wedding breakfast at a certain hour. The confectioner had everything in readiness, but when the hour arrived the wedding party was non est, though one or two invited guests put in an appearance. After considerable delay enquiries were set on foot, when it was found that the bridegroom had mistaken the date of his nuptials, the ceremony having been fixed for the week following that for which he had arranged the breakfast. The feelings of the friends of the respective families can be better imagined than described.

To have been bailed out of gaol, where he was held for supplying Indians with whisky, contesting and winning the world’s broncho-riding contest against the flower of Texas, Wyoming, Colorado, and Oklahoma, then to return to prison wearing the golden belt with 1000 dollars and a handsome saddle to his credit, was the experience of Tam Three Persons, of the Blood Indian Reserve. When the Calgary Stampede opened Three Persons was doing a short term. _ A wealthy cattleman of Macleod supplied the bail money, and Three Persons was placed under the watchful eye of the Chief Inspector of Indian Agencies, Glen Campbell. After winning the championship be returned to custody. Three Persons has received a congratulatory message from the Duke of Connaught’s equerry, saying: “Please convey His Royal Highness’s congratulations to Tam Three Persons on Ids feat of horsemanship.” At Hamilton on Monday some amusement was caused in a case against a Territorial named Albert Graham, who, supported by two sisters, said ho had religious scruples against militarism. He said he belonged to no denomination, but attended services at the Brethren, Baptists, and Church of Christ. He and his sisters quoted Scripture in support of theirvpjea as being commanded to forgive tlupr enemies. Accused said he would father lie murdered b’y the enemy than attempt to kill the enemy. While he would retaliate if struck in the street, he would nob lift his hand in defence of his country. His mother, who was dead, would have been terribly distressed if he fought or shot anyone. The Magistrate: lour mother, where she has gone, has probably learnt better by this time. Accused refused to be drafted into the non-combatant section, where the Magistrate said he could succour the sick and wounded, as it would only ho nursing men back to life in order that they might murder or lie murdered. Accused steadfastly refused to nay the fine, rnd D-. e Madstrato promised him seven days’ imnnsonment if it was not, fortuedming,

adding that Scripture told us to obey the law. v \Tiss Graham: What about God? The Magistrate: That will do, thank you.

Testifying to the character of a woman at Brentford, England, a witness said, “I never knew her to commit suicide before.” A three-year-old boy named Reginald Douglas, who broke his leg when .placing at Hamilton on Monday last, was carried home pick-a-back oy his six-year-old brother, to bo attended By a doctor. The ’ conference arranged by the Hon. F. M. B. Fisher, Minister for Customs, of representatives of the 3 boot industry will be held in VVel- ' Uagton on January 14. lifeJenus of fourpence per pound on tile’production of the first one hundred thousand pounds of quicksilver ' li,if..i a Now Zealand mine is offered by the Government, on conditions detailed'in the current Gazette. It is rumoured ,in Gisborne that, owing to certain agitation which has been going on up the line, trouble has been caused among certain of the railway construction workers north of Rakauroa, and that a paid official was the subject of more than one ‘‘pummelling.” A lady who had occasion to give testimony in the Auckland Police Court, stated, when being sworn, that she wasn’t going to kiss ‘‘that dirty thing,” indicating the use-worn Court copy of the Bible. She produced from her handbag an authorised version of her own, which she had thoughtfully provided for the purpose. The humble bee is supposed to be . very useful (says the Wairarapa Age). A Mastertdn gardener does not think so. He planted a nice lot of broad beans, and watched the flowers bursting forth and the bumble bees clustering around them every morning. He is now looking for the beans; but there are none. An investigation has revealed the fact that the bumble bees, in their pursuit of food, have completely destroyed the crop. A splendid little smoke concert was held at Manaia in the Town Hall last night under the auspices of the Hawera Branch of the Taranaki Provincial .Scottish Society. Stratford was represented by Mr. Alex Henderson, the Society’s secretary, Messrs. Geo. Hall, D. xmccharc. ami b . ,u. and Mr. J. McNeill Adams, of Inglewood was also present. Mr. Alex Me Cracken was in the chair, and much enthusiasm was shown generally. Mr. Wilkie was in great demand, and added to his laurels as an entertainer of ‘‘the first water.’ ’ Land transactions figured largely at the Christchurch Supreme Court on Thursday. A witness stated that he bought a renewable lease in the North Island, but not with the intention oi holding it. The agent selling him the land had stated that, he would soon find another purchaser for the lease, and would place witness on a block in the MataUra district. His Honor stated that the evidence was of interest, as it showed how the North Is- ' land was being converted from an agri cultural country into a big stock and land exchange. ’ At a meeting of the Inglewood Operatic Society held on Monday evening; says the “IngleiVood Record,” it was decided to stage Let Cloches de Corneville at Stratford next week. The mah-in-the-street. however, claims to bo behind the scenes a little with some of the principals, and predicts that the Operatic Society is as near Stratford to-day v as it "is at all likely to be, but this .last is only rumour, the former being the decision of the members ‘‘in meeting assembled.” At one of the shows held this year competing dogs have not yet been returned to their owners, and it is doubtful if they ever will ‘‘come home again'.” Not’firt ,ddth“the Stratford A’, and P. Association. Mr. T. H. Bevis, of Morningside, Auckland, a vice-pre-sident of the Kennel Club of that city.

wrote to the A. and P. Executive a ■ ' few days ago expressing his gratitude '‘■ for promptness in returning his dog if exhibits, which arrived at Auckland at V 9 o’clock, on Saturday morning, “in ■ good condition, with clean bedding, . etc., showing that some of the country shows can teach some of the larger shows a lesson in cleanliness and despatching.” It is proposed to commence the neu Main Trunk railway service, by which a third express is placed on the Auckland run, on Wednesday, December 18th, and it will extend to January 6th. This extra train will leave Wellington at 12135 p.m., in addition to the trains at 11.50 a.m. and 9.10 p.m. The third express will leave Auckland at 10 p.m., arriving in Wellington at 5.46 p.m. The 9.10 p.m. and 11.55 a.m. express time-table will continue to be pbserved from Auckland. The 11.50 a.m. train from Wellington to Auckland will not, between December 18th and January 6th, take passengers for stations between Wellington and Taihape. - j A visitor from Gisborne was inspect ing the sights of the country round about the district, when he espied a 'man, donned in dungarees anu siiirc sleeves, actively engaged in cleaning out a schoolroom. After conversing about the climatic potentialities of the district, the Gisbonito remarked that he supposed the gentleman he was,addressing was one of the railway workmen. “Oh, no,” replied the other, with a genial smile, “I am the English parson.” f The humour of the situation was enjoyed by both''men. although the visitor was somewhat taken aback.

The British “Hip,hip, hurrah” is adopted alike by the Kaiser in offering his congratulations on the fall of Salonika, and by the Chinese who wished Mr William Ah Ket good luckprior to his departure for China _as the Australian delegate to the National Assembly (says a Melbourne paper). Had the Kaiser followed the form sacrosanct to those who cheer in German, he should have cabled “Hoch!” The Chinese, in turn, following national (precedent, should have cried “Mo! Ho! Ho!” which is their usual method of expressing enthusiastic approval. But, from the “Brava I” of the Latin races to the “Oura!” of the Cossacks and the “Shabash!” of the Mohammedans, no cry of partnership competes for quaintness with those revised by the American universities. Foremost amongst these is Princeton’s triumphant yell, typifying the ascent of a rocket and the resultant applause. It runs; “Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah! Tiger! Siss! Boom 1 Ah! Princeton !” The Yale find Harvard cheers are tame compared do the war cry of the less-known Ouachita College, which splits the welkin with “Boom-a-lacka, boom-a-lacka, bow, wow, wow! Ching-a-lacka, Ching-a-lacka, chow, chow, chow; boom-a-lacka, ching-a-lacka, who are wo? Who’s from Ouachita? We, we we!” Even the slogan of the Maori football team has little to boast of compared with this. \ Every four years the great American Republic is violently stirred by politics through the election of a President. America has just passed through such a political upheaval, and has elected Dr. Woodrow Wilson President of the United States. Those who elect Crescent Tea for the family invariably act with good judgment, because it is really the best family tea procurable in Vow Zealand. s

No fewer than 21 farms have been placed under offer to the Government in South Canterbury in response to an advertisement inviting offers of p.aces suitable for experimental farms. The Prime Minister has promised to visit South Canterbury this month and personally inspect the places offered. In Monday’s issue of the “Post,” reference was made to the danger that existed in a culvert in Broadway North, a cow having been imprisoned for some hours. The matter was brought up at the Council’s Works Committee meeting that same evening, and the protection work has now been satisfactorily carried out. Quick work!

Probably no sport in the world is so lucrative as bull-fighting, It is stated that 23 of Spain’s most famous toreadors earn annually between them £200,000. There are-at present two toreadors who earn anything up to £50,000 a year. They are Bombita and Machaquito. The former is married to the daughter of a French nobelman with a highly historical name, and the latter to a Scotswoman. Humane burglars broke into the shooting box of M. Lindet, president of the Paris Law Society, at Fosse, Mousson, and, after ransacking the place, carefully destroyed traps and snares for animals which they found there. On the wall where the traps had been hanging they scrawled the words*. “Be kind to aiiinuils, or else we will return.” There was some amusing evidence in a case at the Supreme Court at Perth, in which William Harris, a storekeeper, self-styled “The Uncrowned King of Three Springs,” sued William Green,-the township schoolmaster, for slander. Plaintiff alleged that Green, speaking at an Agricultural Hall dinner, said that the storekeepers were standing by the farmers during the drought, blit were making 300 per cent profit. Plaintiff’s takings, thereafter, ne alleged, fell £IOO a month. Tne jury found lor the defendant. Every tobacconist sells Regent Cigarettes. Inhalers should try them. Smoko them and share in the Great IjVeo Gift Scheme. - x