"SWAPPING JOBS.”

Stratford Evening Post, Volume XXXI, Issue 51, 14 October 1911, Page 2

"SWAPPING JOBS.”

REUBEN AND THE PARSON

London, September 1. The “Dominion’s” London correspondent writes ns under: —

A good joke has come to an untimely end this week in the little hamlet of Twelshall, St. Margarets, Norfolk. It began a promising career a few days ago, when, fired by tne prerailing spirit of revolt against the injunction to do his duty in that state of life which it had pleased Providence to call him, a farm labourer named Reuben Wehsdalo expressed the opinion that tlie parson’s job could be done by “almost anybody with a bit of gumption,” and publicly challenged the vicar to “swop jobs” for a day. Reuben’s sporting offer was promptly taken up by the vicar, the Rev. Augustine Mackie, much to the delight of the villagers. The parson proposed that as Reuben could not possibly undertake a day’s clerical work involving his officiating in church, he would “swop jobs”' lor a Saturday, which was a comparatively light day for the cleric. He suggested further that the side stakes should be a week’s wages, and that a committee of three—Websdale’s master, a labouring man, and another parson —should decide the question as to which of the contestants did the other man’s work best, j The parson, on his acceptance of Reuben’s challenge, proposed to handicap himself thus: “In consideration of the fact that I have oftentimes done such work as yours, whereas you have probably not liad any experience of mine, I will give you two hours’ start on Saturday morning.” And then he rounded it off by giving Reuben a list of whtft ho would be expected to do on the appointed Saturday. This was the clerical timetable;— 0.30 to IG.—Retranslation of English into Greek. 10 to 11.30.—Oecumenical documents of the faith. Revise the “definition” of the Council of Chalccdon. 11.30 to 12.30.—The Homo-ousion and the Constantinopolitan symbol. 12.30 to I.—The “hapax legomena” <ff the Apocalypse. 3 to s.—House-to-house visiting in St. Mary’s. 6 to 6.3o.—Write out notices for Church porches, and choose hymns for Sunday. 6.30 to 9;—Prepare two sermons and a Children’s address. Reuben’s remarks when he scanned this document are not on record. Possibly they were not strictly ecclesiastical. Still he was a lad of mettle, and forthwith sent an acceptance of the parson’s terms, to the consternation of the reverend gentleman, and to the amazement of the villagers, who promptly decided to make the appointed Saturday a whole holiday. But alas! the contest will not come off, for at the eleventh hour Reuben reconsidered, his position. He did not believe that the parson could beat him at farm work, but he felt convinced that could tackle house-to-house visiting and hymn-selecting satisfactorily, and even prepare a couple of sermons and an address for children. But he felt sure that he would find the hour allowed for dealing with Homo-ousion and the Constantinopolitan symbol absurdly inadequate, and ho had some qualms as .to the retranslation into Greek and the “hapax legomena.” He therefore decided to “give the parson best” without a fight; greatly, it is said, to the disappointment of the Rev. Mackie. Of course' Reuben’s 1 challenge was foolish, but the parson’s Saturday itinerary was not a fair sample of a clergyman’s day’s “work.” Possibly Mr Mackie may wile away his leisure hours with retranslations and the rest of it, and as lie took .tjurd-class honours in the classical tripos some ten years ago he would no doubt be able to make some show at carrying out his own programme, but five Hours’ tudy of abstruse subject can hardly be deemed a legitimate part of a vicar’s “job.” Reuben might easily have flabbergasted the parson by requiring him, in addition to doing the orthodox work of a farm labourer, to spice his day’s toil with amourous half-hours with village lassies, pots of porter at the local inn, and similar items, winding up with—“lo p.m.—Go Homo drunk.”