Untitled

Southland Times, Issue 889, 27 January 1868, Page 3

By taking revenge, a man is but even with his enemy ; but ill paasiug in over lie is superior. People run each other down as though they thought they eoul.l make pedestals of their neighbours' characters, and look tall by standing upon them. A writer, in 'speaking of' bonnets,' Bays the coalscuttle was in vogue when blushing was known ; but now both are obsolete. A ssnart youngster, hearing his mother remark that Ehe was fond of music, exclaimed, " Then why don't you buy me a drum ?"- A crusty old batchelor says that Adam's wife was called Eve because when she appeared man's day of happiness was drawing to a clos >. It is difficult, if not impossible, for men to love and be wise ; even tho heathen gods, when they were in love, made fools of themselves. " 13oy, did you let that gun orl ?" exclaimed an enraged schoolmaster. "Yes sir." " .Well, what do you think I ought to do to you?" " Why, let me off." An old gentleman, travelling some years ago 'inside the Uath mail, had two ladies' sisters, for companions. Iho younger, an invalid, soon fell asleep, and the old gentleman expressed his regret to s c bo charming. .a young lady in ili health. "Ah! yes, indeed," sighed the eidor sister j "n disease of the heart." "Dear me," was -the sympathetic response, " at her age ! Ossofication, perhaps ?" " Ossifi— ? Oh no, sir! a lieutenant." What roof covers the most noisy tenant ?— The roof of tho mouth. , . How sweet to recline in the lapsp of agos — saj ago 1 ab ut eighteen. " Eecollect, s'r," said a tavern-keeper to c gentleman who was about leaving nis house without paying his bill, " recollect, sir, if you shoulc lose your puree, you didn't pull it out here."