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Southland Times, Volume III, Issue 215, 12 February 1866, Page 3

Some children, playing on the sands at Saline, coast of Wexford, the other day, found an earthenware vessel which contained about 600 silver coins. The entire collection is English, and belongs to the period of Henery VIII. " Dennis, my boy," said an English schoolmaster to his Hibernian pupil. "I fear I shall make nothing of you ; you've no application." " An" sure enough, sir," said the quick-witted lad, " isn't it meself that's always being told there's no occasion for it ? Don't I see every day in the newspapers that ' no Irish need apply at all, at all." Those who have been once dear to us, by whatever offence they may have alienated our affection when living, are generally remembered with tenderness when dead ; and after the grave has sheltered them from our resentment, and rendered reconciliation impossible, we often regret as severe that conduct which before we approved as just. Pat ona Treadmill — An Irishman, some time ago, was committed to the House of Correction for a misdemeanour, aud sentenced to work on the treadmill for the space of a month. He sbserved, at the expiration of his task, " What a great deal of fatigue and botheration it would have saved us poor eratlyirs, if taey had but Invented it to go by sthaame, like all other watermills ; for, burn me, if I have not been after going up stairs for this four weeks, but could not reach the chamber door at all, at all." Pat Nonplussed. — There happened to grow up between Patrick and a bragging down-easter a very fierce contest as to the comparative size of different animals in this and the " ould counthry," when Mr. O'Flaherty declared that in Ireland the " bees were as big as sheep." " Very well," interrupted Ichabod, " how big are the hives ?" "As big as yourn, by jabers!" "Then how do the bees get into their hives ?" Paddy scratched his head, and, after a few moments' reflection, replied, " Ohj that's their own look out." Quebies. — Why are pretty girls like oatmeal cakes ? Because they give the heartburn. — Why do the recriminations of married couples resemlle the sound of waves on the shore ? .Because they are murmurs of the tiea. — Why is playing chess a more exemplary occupation than playing cards ? Because you play at chess with two bishops, and at cards with iour knaves. — What commodity is always afforded at cost ? The law. — If you want to be a " swell of the first water, what should you do ? Get the dropsy. — In what circumstances is a woman that wears stays ? Straitened circumstances. — American Paper.