Page 2 Advertisements Column 1

Southland Times, Volume III, Issue 197, 3 January 1866, Page 2

" Our organ," eaid Seth, <: the organ of our meeting house, imitated thunder so natural one Sunday, that it curdled all the milk for five miles round."

Very Convenient. — It is said that -when a crew of Chinese pirates get out of provisions, they salt their own junk and eat ife. The Dunce's Stool. — A pupil teacher, who has just received an appointment in a quiet country village near Manchester, says, " Among the scanty furniture I espied a three-legged stool. 'Is that the dunce's stool ?' I said to a little girl of five. Her eyes sparkled, and her curls nodded assent, and her lips rippled out, ' I suppose it is — the teacher always sits on that.' " Mated. — -A bacholor sea captain, who was remarking the other day that he wanted a good chief officer, was promptly informed by a young lady present that she had no objection to be his first mate. He took the hint; — and the lady. Loosing, poe a Situation under Govern ment. — Petroleum V. Naseby writes that he had an ninterview with the President lately, which terminated thus:---' , Is there any little thiug I kin do for you ?" says- he. " Nothin' partiklar. I would accept a small post orfis if sitooatid within ezy range of a distillery. My politikle dase is well nigh over. Let me but see the old party wunst moar behold the constitooshen ea it is, the Uneyun ea it was, and the nigger where he ouglit to be,and I will rap the mantel of prcvate lifo around h^rihl go into delirium tremens happy. I hev no embishen, I am in the seep and jailer leaf. Theee whitin' locks, them sunken cheeks warn me that age and "wiskey hev dun their puffek work,'and tbat I shall soon go heofo